7-23-2011 The Weekend Claw

A) The Crawfish gives a mighty “OOH-RAH!” to former Corporal Dakota Meyer, USMC, who has been informed by President Obama that he will be awarded the Medal of Honor for his actions in Afghanistan. He becomes the first living Marine to receive the MOH in 41 years. “Well done!”

B) I normally don’t put any comedy this early in the column, but I can’t pass this one up. Here’s a video of Barack Obama saying that FDR “was pretty fiscally conservative.” If Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachmann said something that outlandish, the media would crucify them.

C) The media is trying sooooo hard to make the GOP look like the bad and ignorant folks in the budget debate. PMSNBC’s Contessa Brewer (BTW, Contessa is the female version of Count, the 5th level of nobility after king/queen, prince/princess, duke/duchess, and marquis/marquess, so we know her level of spoiled bratness growing up) tried to explain a Republican Congressman that failure to pass a bailout would send the nation into a depression. When he disagreed, she questioned his credentials on economics, since the only people who know more than liberal media types are Democrat politicians. Epic Fail! Her opponent in this discussion was Alabama’s Mo Brooks, who graduated with high honors in 3 years from Duke with a degree in economics.

D) Speaking of media malfeasance, I must give language and content warnings for the video linked in this paragraph. Can you imagine what would happen if this had been a conservative show talking about Democrat politicians? How come there was no vast media outcry over this? Where is the National Organization of Women or any other feminist group on this subject? (@#^$ liberal hypocrites! Of course, there aren’t many liberal women worth taking to bed in the first place....

E) The jobless numbers went up again this week, and of course that news was UNEXPECTED according to the media.

F) Senator Harkin of Iowa must be turning corn into shine again. He refers to the Tea Party as a “cult fringe”, which is simply an acknowledgement that his party opposes anything that is actually written into the Constitution. Then he goes off saying that the debt was “mostly was racked up by a Republican House, a Republican Senate and a Republican President in the last 8 years.” Really? First of all, the GOP only held all three for 6 years. Secondly, they were being led by a big-government liberal who disguised his actions by calling them “compassionate conservatism”. Thirdly, the out-of-control spending began in January of 2007, when Red Nanny P-Lousy and Dingy Harry took control of Congress, then got shot full of steroids when Barack Hussein Obama MMM MMM MMM came to power. Here’s a timeline of the fiscal actions taken by Barack Obama and the Democrats since they took control of the government. You will notice that the public debt upon his inauguration was $6.31 trillion, and that number has gone up by $3.44 trillion in less than three years. QUIT BLAMING BUSH!

G) Even if we discount the first year of Bush’s Presidency, when there was a budget surplus and 9-11 had not crapped all over the economy, his other SEVEN years had deficits totaling $2.087 trillion. You won’t find any conservatives defending those numbers, as they prove yet again that W was a big-government liberal, but Obama has over 150% of that number in less than THREE years.

H) The Harry Reid-led Senate voted to not even bring up Cut, Cap, and Balance for debate on Friday, so they could quickly vacate DC. Dingy said that the bill was the worst piece of legislation to ever hit the Senate floor, although we all know that Obamacare was much worse. Reid said that the Senate could do no further work until the House passed a bill, since all revenue bills must, Constitutionally, originate in the House. Since he said that, it means that the only bill he will allow to be debated will be a big tax increase bill. The House has passed two plans, so the American people should be able to see who is refusing to do their jobs.

I) The President shifted blame for the lack of a drug d…er, debt deal to the media, saying a “splintered” media (with See-BS, ABC, NBC, MSNBC, CNN, CNBC, the Oprah Winfrey Network, Noo Yawk Slimes, Washington Compost, El Lay Times, Atlanta Journal of Constipation, HuffPo, and others on the left, and Fox News and Wall Street Journal on the right) fanning the flames so that there is no “compromise”, which Democrats always define as “the GOP letting us get whatever we want.” Yes, Barack Obama wants a cohesive media, all on the same page of the same playbook. You remember that…Pravda, Isvestia, TASS, Novotsi…

J) Then there are the Democrat cheerleaders at CNN, who are desperately trying to get all of you to miss an important bit of information in their latest polling data. It seems that each and every demographic that they polled supports a balanced budget amendment. This simply cannot be allowed!

K) Of course Moonshine Harkin and a few other Dems might be in a bit of trouble if the media ever gloms onto the roll call from a Senate vote in 1997 on a Balanced Budget Amendment. It’s not just the far-right “cult fringe” that supports such a measure, considering that Harkin, Biden, Durbin, Feinstein, and even Dingy Harry himself all voted for the BBA.

L) June’s existing-home sales numbers were down, and just like every other bit of bad economic news since Pelosi and Reid took over Congress in 2007, this news is (say it with me) “unexpected”. Truly “unexpected” economic news during the reign of King Barack I will be anything that is really positive.

M) The White House is whizzing on our heads and telling us it is raining…again. They are the most fundamentally dishonest Administration in history, making Billy Jeff and Trickydick look more honest than Abe. On Thursday, White House Propaganda Minister Carney had the chutzpah to announce: “Well, two things remain uncontestably true. The economy is vastly improved from what it was when Barack Obama was sworn into office as president.” This bunch must be smokin’ da crack, but watch the media pick up on that line and run with it. Although the words are usually attributed to Lenin or Goebbels, it could have come from our modern Democrats…a lie told often enough becomes the truth.

N) While on the subject of lies from this Administration, take a gander at the latest work from Janet Incompitano’s Department of Homeland Insecurity. Terrorists are really all white folks, even “Jihad Jane” has (artificially enhanced) bright blue eyes. Terrorists are people who oppose surveillance, who write on paper, who drive vans, and who wear hoodies. She wants all Americans to become informants. Kinda reminds us of the early Nazi Gestapo, the Soviet NKVD and KGB, and East Germany’s Stasi. Remember that the Administration put out a White House e-mail address for people to inform on those who opposed Obamacare? I self-reported, as did a bunch of my friends. The Anti Liberal Zone’s Gunny G self-reported over a hundred times! This is how dictators build and maintain their power.

O) Just before Independence Day, a study was released that showed how people who go to July 4th events are swayed to support conservative positions, presumably because conservatives actually love our nation while liberals want to “fundamentally change” it. Now comes another study, this time showing that the image of the American flag sways voters to Republican voting patterns. The Crawfish imagines that images of our military personnel and equipment or the Constitution probably do the same. Patriotism: one side has it, the other doesn’t. Fox News commenter “2fred” had a great comment on the story: “Since many Democrats are used to seeing stars, i.e. flitting flashes of brilliance dancing around their visual periphery due to drug usage, concussion, etc., the presence of actual stars had a canceling effect, thus they were able to see more clearly.”

P) Gunrunner and Castaway might have another brother. It looks like the US government has been selling weaponry to the Zetas drug cartel, including anti-aircraft weapons, through the U.S. Direct Commercial Sales Program, which is run by Hillary!’s State Department.

Q) I’m not sayin’ that Obamacare is a jobs killer. That’s because I don’t have to, since the proof is already available. There are many reasons that the American people opposed that bill, why it required many Congressional bribes to gain passage, and why so many supporters (SEIU, other unions, AARP) have asked for exemptions.

R) Democrats just don’t get it. What part of “illegal” is so damned hard to understand? What part of too much government spending is so hard to understand? Governor Patrick of Taxachusetts is now supporting a measure to let illegals pay in-state rates on college tuition, which means that the taxpayers of that state will now subsidize the college education of people who have no right to be in our country. Don’t subsidize them. DEPORT THEM!

S) John Boehner is an idiot. Then again, we saw that in the last round of budget negotiations.

T) The jobs market is really hell on the younger folks these days. They are the victims of a severe quadruple-whammy. First of all, our population is living longer, so a much larger investment portfolio is required for people to retire on. Secondly, our economy over the past 35 years or so has required two paychecks to support a family. This means that there are TWO older Americans taking up the jobs. Thirdly, the Baby-boomer crowd is the largest generation in our history, and they are the ones who should be starting to retire, but they aren’t. And lastly, the Obama-Pelosi-Reid economy has killed millions of jobs in our country. So how’s that hopey-changey stuff workin’ out for ya?

U) President Obama gave a foreign automaker a gift of $1.3 billion this week, when he allowed Fiat to buy the remaining Chrysler stocks Obama had purchased to bail out his buddies in the UAW. This “pays off” the debt 6 years early. Sensible people would have waited out a few more of those years to get back more of the taxpayers’ money, but what does Obama care about the taxpayers and our debt? His “assistant secretary for financial stability” (a job CLEARLY defined in the Constitution) actually bragged about it, saying “This is a major accomplishment and further evidence of the success of the administration's actions” when in a non-skewed universe the loss of $1.3 billion is considered another sign of this Administration’s failures.

V) Well, it looks like the scientific folks might have figured out why F-22 pilots were getting hypoxia. After looking at all of the complex systems, mostly the On-Board Oxygen Generating System, the cause appears to be something rather simple. Now let’s get those Raptors back in the sky!

W) Here is yet another reason to support Representative Allen West. He is strongly opposing the proposed sale of 125 M1A1 Abrams main battle tanks to the Muslim Brotherhood. Sultan Bu’raq al Obama wants Egypt, meaning the Muslim Brotherhood, to have these tanks, since they have already announced their intention of resuming a state of war with Israel. Oh, and regarding his spat with Debbie the Ditz, she has a very bad memory, because here is a video showing who started the personal attacks, and how that person’s attacks were filled with lies about Allen West and every Constitution-loving Tea Party member.

X) For the Brain Dead Polling Information of the Week, we go to Public Policy Polling’s results from Tuesday. Forty percent unsure????

Y) I actually got the following story from two different e-mails, but Buck sent it first:
In 1952, Armon M. Sweat, Jr., a member of the Texas House of Representatives, was asked about his position on whiskey. What follows is his exact answer (taken from the Political Archives of Texas):

"If you mean whiskey, the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean that evil drink that topples Christian men and women from the pinnacles of righteous and gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, shame, despair, helplessness, and hopelessness, then, my friend, I am opposed to it with every fiber of my being.

However, if by whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the elixir of life, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer, the stimulating sip that puts a little spring in the step of an elderly gentleman on a frosty morning; if you mean that drink that enables man to magnify his joy, and to forget life's great tragedies and heartbreaks and sorrow; if you mean that drink the sale of which pours into Texas treasuries untold millions of dollars each year, that provides tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitifully aged and infirm, to build the finest highways, hospitals, universities, and community colleges in this nation, then my friend, I am absolutely, unequivocally in favor of it.

This is my position, and as always, I refuse to compromise on matters of principle."

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The first method of estimating the intelligence of a ruler is to look at the men he has around him."- Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince

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