Wednesday, August 31, 2011

8-31-2011 The Weekly Claw

There was puh-lenty of stuff in the news this week to ponder. So what do I start my column with? An impending train wreck on ABC.

A) I know 99% of y’all don’t really care, but the new season’s celebrities for “Dancing With the Stars” was announced Monday, and it includes a good selection of liberal role models. Carson Kressley is a flamer designer who came to fame on “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy”. Chaz Bono is the daughter of Cher (Steeeeerike One!), who became a highly public ugly lesbian (Steeeeerike Two!), and then became an even uglier he-she and huge advocate for special rights for those folks who choose to be FREAKS (Steeeeeerike Three! Have a seat!). Ron Artest is an NBA thug/player who became famous for charging into the stands to beat up a fan, and now wants to change his name to Peace something or other. Rob Kardashian is famous for…being one of the Kardashian family and absolutely nothing else. Then there’s Ricki Lake and Nancy Grace. Yep. Let’s push that left wing agenda on the network’s most popular show. The only “stars” worth watching are JR Martinez, a badly burned Iraq War vet turned soap actor, and US Women’s National Soccer goalkeeper Hope Solo (hot stuff!). Oh, and there’s Chynna Phillips (singer from Wilson Phillips, daughter of Mamas and Papas’ John Phillips), David Arquette (somewhat of an actor), Elisabetta Canalis (Italian model and actress, face shots look good but let’s see how she fills out a skimpy dress), and reality TV star turned somewhat actress Kristin Cavallari (see notes for Canalis).

Now back to our regularly scheduled column.

B) I know all of you were expecting this one. On the sixth anniversary of Katrina, the Obama Administration is patting itself on the back for their response to Irene. Labor Ditz Solis: “Last week, as the specter of Hurricane Irene loomed, the Obama administration was ready, deploying assistance teams to staging bases up and down the East Coast. They were armed with emergency supplies and detailed contingency plans well before the storm arrived. This type of coordinated response is what Americans expect and deserve from their government. We must never again be caught flat-footed.” Well, it is easy to prepare when the Governors and Mayors of the areas in the crosshairs take it seriously and abide by emergency plans instead of violating state laws by refusing to use the emergency plans. Oh and it is helpful when the Governors let other states pre-position National Guard equipment and troops ahead of the storm instead of refusing to let them into a state as happened before Katrina.

C) Chrysler Corporation’s ad campaigns this year have had a tag line of “Imported from Detroit”, insinuating that their automobiles are as good as or better than foreign brands. In reality, it shows that Detroit is no longer really American. This column by Frosty Wooldridge details that city’s destruction at the hands of liberalism and multi-culturalism. Hat tip to fellow blogger Saltwater for this one.

D) The House GOP is once again laying out a plan to help American businesses get back on their feet so our economy can start a real recovery. Chuck You Schumer immediately bleated “it’s clear Republicans are still putting politics ahead of our economic recovery.” Really, Upchuck? The GOP wants to HELP America and restrain the federal government. Which party wants to restrain business and employment so they can get more Americans dependent upon the government so they will vote for more big government handouts? Please, Upchuck, go through Eric Cantor’s plan and show us what parts of it won’t work. Here’s a hint, your list will be much smaller than his list.

E) One of Obama’s jobs plans involves not allowing employers to discriminate against the unemployed. What? The Chosen One and others seem to believe that employers don’t hire people unless they are already employed. Huh? That would mean that no jobs are ever created, just shuffled. If an employer need employees, they will generally look at the QUALIFICATIONS of the applicants and make their decisions.

F) Barack Obama’s entire family is a bunch of freeloaders and law breakers. First there was…well, we won’t get into the birth certificate and Connecticut Social Insecurity number here, nor the tax fraud on his Chicago property, nor his wife’s “critical” $300,000.00 per year job at a hospital that was deemed “non-essential” and cut as soon as she moved into the White House. Let’s start with his Auntie Zeituni, who came to this nation illegally in 2000, was ordered deported in 2004, and was still here living on taxpayer money when her nephew was elected. The Administration of Transparency had her deportation hearing in 2010 closed and got the judge to say she could stay and continue to live on the taxpayer dime even though her nephew was now worth millions. Now we have an uncle, Onyango Obama, who is also living here illegally and on the taxpayer dime, with a false drivers license and false Social Insecurity card. He was arrested for driving drunk last week after almost crashing into a police car. He was twice previously cited for selling booze to underage folks. Oh, did I mention that he was also previously ordered to be deported to Kenya? Do you see any reasons that Obama might be opposing efforts to deport illegals and supporting amnesty programs?

G) While we’re talking about lawbreaking by the Obama family, Michelle Obama herself is guilty of violating the Lacey Act if the Injustice Department’s crusade against Gibson Guitars is based in facts. Then again, our good friend Gunny G found out some of the dirty details behind the repeated raids on Gibson. Gibson and Martin guitars use the same woods for their fingerboards, but Gibson’s CEO is a Republican donor while Martin’s CEO donates to the donkeys.

H) Do the Obamites really think that news of this lie wouldn’t leak out? The Magical Misery Bus Tour was not only a campaign tour masquerading as a fact-finding tour (never mind that the Obamites don’t believe in facts), but it wasn’t even a bus tour. The Chosen One would get into Air Force One, fly to an airport large enough for that beast, get into one of the two busses procured for this event at over $1.1 million each, drive to the next town over, hold a campaign event, return to the airport, and fly to the next city, where the OTHER $1.1 million bus was waiting (courtesy of an Air Force C-17 Globemaster or C-5 Galaxy) and repeat the process. Meanwhile, the first Short Bus One would be loaded into another C-17 or C-5 and hopscotched to the following tour stop. Just how much this cost the taxpayers will never be disclosed, but it wasn’t cheap. Then again, we can’t have Dear Leader transported in anything less than the luxury of Air Force One, can we? Nothing is too good for our King.

I) There have now been two resignations (probably forced) due to the Fast & Furious scandal. Unfortunately, they weren’t named Obama and Holder.

J) Okay, who let the Prophet Algoracle and the Church of Human Origin Global Warming And Similar Horrors (HOGWASH) out of their cave? Fat Al is now proclaiming that people who note real scientific data that refutes his Glo-Bull Warming scam are akin to the racists who opposed the Civil Rights Act of 1964. First of all, if humans are to blame for global temperatures, then why are the polar ice caps melting…on Mars? Secondly, didn’t Al Gore Sr. famously vote against the Civil Rights Act of 1964? Back to your hole, Al.

K) Fat Al isn’t gonna like this one little bit. It is now proven science that any rises in global temps are not because of man. Let’s see him TRY to dispute any of this research.

L) Wait a second, I thought folks were attacking Rick Perry over a Gardasil mandate. That mandate didn’t pass the state legislature. This one might pass in one of the most liberal legislatures known to mankind.

M) This is the kind of waste that really does need to be addressed in the defense budget, and the budgets of every federal Bureau, Department, etc. Throwing away an average of $72 million per year on overdue shipping containers? Stupid mistakes like that, if eliminated throughout the government, could probably save more per year than the “debt deal” will save anytime soon. Let’s not give Steny Hoyer (WTF kind of name is “Steny”?) any more ammunition for the huge defense cuts he desires. He is noticing wasteful spending in Defense (yes, there is a good amount wasted), but of course notes nothing wasteful in Welfare, Food Stamps, housing for moochers, Obamacare… The annual exercise in units blowing the remainder of their budget every September on stuff not really needed does need to end.

N) Speaking of waste in defense, how much damage was inflicted on the engines of these trucks? The mental requirements for service in the Noo Joisey National Guard must not be all that high. The videographer isn’t the sharpest knife in the box either, since he keeps talking about the “exhaust” when what matters is the intake at the snorkel behind the cab.

O) Have you ever noticed that most abortion advocates are women that would only have to worry about an abortion if they were dating blind men? Of course, their fellow liberals are trying to give them some hope for their lot in life.

P) The Administration continues to go against the will of the American people and the votes of Congress. Now the Labor Department’s Hilda Solis has signed a document with the ambassadors from several south-of-the-border nations to form “partnerships” to educate illegal aliens on their rights within the United States. If they are here illegally, they have one right and one right only: the right to be DEPORTED IMMEDIATELY! What about “illegal” is so hard for the Democratic Party to understand?

Q) Do we need more proof of how Mexican immigrants are becoming more and more non-American? How about their race groups calling for a new civil war so they can take over the southwestern US? Go ahead and keep up that rhetoric. Fire the first shots. If you do, WE will be firing the last shots!

R) “The problem is . . . if we secure the border, then you all won’t have any reason to support ‘comprehensive immigration reform.’” [Audible gasps were heard throughout the audience.] “In other words, they’re holding it hostage. They don’t want to secure the border unless and until it is combined with ‘comprehensive immigration reform.’” Finally! Senator John Kyl comes out and publicly states exactly what the Democrats have been doing for years with regard to border security. Will this get seen anywhere other than You Tube, Facebook,, and the blogosphere? I doubt it.

S) Representative Ilena Ros-Lehtinen has introduced legislation to seriously reform the United Nations and curtail our own contributions to UN actions that we don’t approve of. That is, of course, opposed by the Democrats.

“Moreover, most people who serve in Washington have been trained either as lawyers or as political operatives – professions that tend to place a premium on winning arguments rather than solving problems.” –Barack Obama (lawyer), “The Audacity of Hope”

The Constitution of the United States

Follow me on Facebook.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

8-27-2011 The Weekend Claw

By the time you read this, DC will have been hit by an earthquake, a hurricane, and the return of Dear Leader. Sometimes I feel sorry for that city.

A) The Obamas got blasted for taking two aircraft to their vacation, necessitating two motorcades and tens of thousands of taxpayer dollars to be used up. Well, the message evidently was not received. His Majesty decided to return to DC on Friday evening, presumably to start dealing with the hurricane, the earthquake aftermath, Libya, his “jobs plan”, and…oh forget that stuff. He’s planning the next campaign tour. Meanwhile, Michelle Antoinette and the junior freeloaders won’t return until Saturday afternoon, necessitating yet another flight and motorcade (hey, it’s only money from those eeevilll rich taxpayers). This extra trip will also put all involved into more danger as Hurricane Irene bears down on DC in the same time period.

B) If I’m ever heading to Indiana, will someone please remind me to stop by Goshen College and defecate at the main entrance. If you dislike our nation that much, get the Hell out!

C) If you don’t think that the government is completely out of control, just read this article. Yes, our government is raiding guitar factories because some of the woods used might come from Madagascar. WHO CARES?!?! The envirowackos and their Democrat allies are going hog-friggin-wild. It is beyond time for adults to return to DC and shred 75% of the laws and regulations currently in place. Update: Gibson Guitars has affidavits from officials in Madagascar and the US showing that they are fully in compliance with Madagascar laws, and therefore US laws, but the Obama Administration doesn’t care.

D) The Crawfish is sure that the liberal media in the US and Europe will blame Israel for their airstrikes against muslim terrorists in Gaza following yet another round of rocket attacks by said muslim terrorists. Israel needs to bulldoze the entirety of Gaza, ship all the muslims to Jordan, and rebuild that part of Israel for Israelis.

E) The Democrats have used billionaire Warren Buffett to push for higher taxes on the rich, with Buffett saying that the rich can afford it and would gladly give up some of their dough. In reality, Warren Buffett has most of his money in tax shelters and his company is in a long-running dispute with the IRS over their tax bills. Yes, the billionaire has failed to pay tens of millions of dollars in business taxes. Just another hypocritical Democrat!

F) It looks like the Obama Jobs Plan is going to include doubling down on what caused the 2008 housing crash. Yes, he wants to give mortgage loans to people who have poor credit and can’t afford a house. To do so won’t involve another propping up of Freddie and Fannie. Nooooooo. This time the leftists are just going to have the government take them over outright! Talk about stuck on stooooopid!

G) The Democrats keep saying that big government creates private sector jobs, but the GOP has real numbers and reality on their side. We just need to hammer the numbers home.

H) Once again, Texas is taking the lead. This time, my state is going to start deporting prison inmates who are citizens of other countries. Of course, this whole plan relies on the feds to uphold their pledge to actually deport the criminals instead of releasing them on parole within the state. We need to also bill the other nations for the court, incarceration, and transportation costs and payments to the victims or families of victims.

I) This story got sent to me by about five readers, but Garnet92 was first, so he gets the hat tip. Singer, writer, politician, and famous Jewish cowboy Kinky Friedman, who ran against Rick Perry for Governor, has come out in support of Perry. Here’s a quote that could ONLY come from Kinky: “These days, of course, I would support Charlie Sheen over Obama. Obama has done for the economy what pantyhose did for foreplay.” Gotta love it!

J) Gen Y TV covered this event, but there appeared to be a complete lack of coverage by the alphabet networks. I wonder why that may be. Could it be that this video proves conclusively that the Tea Party is anything but an all-white racist kook organization? (Hat tip to Claw reader “Saltwater”)

K) Noo Yawk’s Mayor has absolutely no problem with the muslims building a conquest mosque near the World Trade Center site, but he has helped prevent a Greek Orthodox church that was damaged in the 9-11 attacks. He is also banning clergy from the 10th anniversary commemoration. Why do liberal Jews hate Christianity and support Islam?

L) We have finally found out why Bill Clinton looks so sickly and anorexic.

M) I’m guessing that the Marine Corps is not allowing beans or potato salad to be served to the Marines serving in Afghanistan.

N) Grab a Kleenex before opening this link. If it doesn’t bring a tear to your eye, you must be an anti-American liberal. If only our politicians would have that much dedication to those who wear our uniforms.

O) While the Democrats are trying to slash defense spending, the Pentagon has released a new report showing that the Chinese are rapidly building up and modernizing their forces with the goal of preventing us from interfering with their eventual takeover of Taiwan and future dominance of the western Pacific. Their first stealthy strike fighter is in the test flight stage. They now have an aircraft carrier to form their naval aviation doctrine and training with as they build up their own carrier force. Their one-child policy of the past two decades has given them a very male-heavy population, and the only way to even that out is through a nice, big, bloody war.

P) The First Grifter really does love her taxpayer-paid vacations. While real Americans are struggling, she spends $10,000,000.00+ of OUR money to live it up wherever and whenever she wants.

Q) This story is not kid-friendly. In fact, it needs to be read in a plain computer wrapped in a brown paper bag.

R) This video clip from the 2008 campaign needs to be a part of every other ad run by the GOP candidate in 2012. He just called himself “irresponsible” and “unpatriotic”!

S) The Washington Post is trying to go after Rick Perry by pointing out that 234 executions have taken place in Texas during his Governorship. The Crawfish is also angry at that number. It should be MUCH higher!

T) Representative Elijah Cummings (Jassack-MD) says that most blacks “feel this President has been treated unfairly” and he does have a valid point. It has been completely unfair of the media to give Barack Obama a complete pass on his lack of experience, his associations with radical marxists and racists, his assaults on the Constitution, his associations with known and unrepentant terrorists, his actual religion, etc.

U) Victor Davis Hanson provides yet another lesson in vacuous liberal logic. Why do the same thing over and over when it has proven to never work? Because neither the malady nor the medicine have killed the patient yet.

V) Pakistani-born Canadian activist Tarek Fatah recently gave a speech for livecity in which he again pointed out the dangers of Islamism. Here is the video of that speech. It is a bit long, but you’ll be glad you stayed with it. If you’re wondering about him being in a wheelchair, no he wasn’t attacked by muslims for his activism. This year he was diagnosed with a massive tumor on his spine.

W) Remember what I said about Ron Paul after the Iowa debate? This story backs up my assertion. ‘Nuff said.

X) This is rich. Eric Holder’s Injustice Department has been refusing to turn over papers and evidence regarding their illegal Fast & Furious operation to Congressional committees doing investigations. Now the Affirmative Action Attorney General is demanding papers from Congress so that he can doctor them for an “independent” investigation by his Inspector General department. If the IG wants the info, he/she can request it directly so that Holder doesn’t get any chance to mess with it. Just like Watergate, the cover-up is getting worse than the original crimes, even though in this case the original crimes have lead directly to multiple deaths including that of an American law enforcement officer.

Y) Thank you Michelle (***sigh***) Malkin for honoring and remembering Joey Vento better than I ever could. I hope Joey’s legacy becomes an America where immigrants once again assimilate to OUR culture and OUR language instead of demanding that we assimilate to their cultures and languages.

Z) Borrowing a line from Larry the Cable Guy, I don’t care who you are. THIS is funny! I can’t believe she didn’t think of that possibility.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“Moreover, most people who serve in Washington have been trained either as lawyers or as political operatives – professions that tend to place a premium on winning arguments rather than solving problems.” –Barack Obama (lawyer), “The Audacity of Hope”

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

8-24-2011 The Weekly Claw

Last week, racist Representative Maxine Waters said that the Tea Party could “go straight to Hell.” For once, I agree with Maxine. Tea Party affiliated folks NEED to go to Hell in January of 2013, to replace the Dim-ocrats that they have defeated in the November 2012 elections!

A) Other Dims chimed in this week with Obama-style “civility”, like Jesse the Racial Shakedown Artist. According to America’s premier race-baiter, the Tea Party is…wait for it…RACIST because they support that old document written by white slaveowners. He actually managed to say that the Tea Party should be called “the Fort Sumter Tea Party that sought to maintain states’ rights and slavery.” Meanwhile, Florida’s Frederica Wilson spouted off with: “The real enemy is the Tea Party –- let’s remember that. The Tea Party holds Congress hostage … They have one goal in mind, and that’s to make President Obama a one-term president.” Well, she is PARTIALLY correct. One goal of the Tea Party is to get Obama unelected, but the real goals are to reassert the Constitution as the Supreme Law of the Land and to bring fiscal sanity to DC. If supporting the Constitution makes the Tea Party racist, extreme, and the enemy to these people, what does that say about the Democratic Party?

B) Once a racist and communist activist, always a racist and communist activist. Barack Obama spent part of his posh vacation with one of his Haaaaah-vahd mentors (and also taught micHELLe), who is a Black Panther and a Marxist. Oh, and his daughter recently was hired by Eric Holder.

C) Let’s flash back to Obama’s Presidential campaign. Anybody who paid attention to history and everybody associated with The Chosen One knew what was coming, but the Democrats and their allies in the major media denied everything. We tried to warn America, but they fell for the historical chance to elect a black man, no matter how unqualified, and his whole hopey-changey nonsense.

D) The whole idea of the Civil Rights movement was to have people judged by their actions, words, and character instead of by their skin color. Unfortunately for black America, the black politicians who came to the forefront during that time all decided that racial politics and big government liberalism should take priority over anything Dr. King believed in. They have failed, and continue to fail, black America, but black America continues to re-elect them time and time again no matter what their results are.

E) Another animal has surfaced on the streets of Chicago. This punk coldly gunned down a 17-year old pregnant girl because she was seen walking with a member of another gang. Of course his family lies to the press by saying that he is NOT in a gang, despite his lengthy record, and that it couldn’t have been him because he’s limping due to being shot in the leg recently (although he has not limped at all since being in police custody).

F) It looks like some of the Republican Presidential candidates are actually taking a stance that is not only conservative, but Constitutional. They are calling for the end of the Department of Education, and returning responsibility for educating America’s youth to the states, where it belongs according to the Constitution.

G) One of The Crawfish’s Senators hits the nail on the head with this opinion piece. Yes, overregulation by the federal government stifles job growth, and is a root cause of our current economic woes. The cost to the private sector of complying with these regulations runs into the tens of billions of dollars every year. That’s money that could be spent employing people and paying for employee benefits.

H) I’m not saying that Michael Bloomberg is an idiot. I’ll let him make sure that there’s no argument on the issue. He says that the “single biggest” thing Obama can do to create jobs is to allow more immigration. Huh? Bringing in more people isn’t going to do anything positive for the people who are already here and jobless. How about kicking out the illegal aliens, which would open up over 10,000,000 jobs?

I) New home sales dropped yet again, so the news was…say it with me…UNEXPECTED!!!!!

J) One of the core big-money constituencies of the Democratic Party has their panties in a wad over a GOP candidate for the White House. The trial lawyers absolutely hate Rick Perry, because he has presided over some important tort reforms in Texas that have worked. Texas has instituted “loser pays” in many areas of trial law, which has reduced frivolous lawsuits and made the state much friendlier to businesses. With that law in play, insurance companies don’t simply settle when lawsuits arise. It also frees up the courts so that they can handle real cases. We need “loser pays” throughout the nation.

K) One of my co-workers found this interesting story. A motorist gets pulled over, and his actions evidently cause the cop to say he has probable cause to search the vehicle, where he finds some drugs. The motorist believes that the cop’s dashcam video will show that the cop had no probably cause to search, but the video somehow got erased. The Texas Court of Criminal Appeals sided with the Travis County Sheriff’s Department, allowing the purposeful destruction of evidence to stand.

L) Did you know that two-thirds of all federal tax revenue goes to pay welfare and other entitlement programs? As a percentage of GDP, that’s 10% now. It is also double the amount spent on national defense.

M) Let’ s get this straight. Egypt allows muslim terrorists to attack Israel from within Egypt. Israel responds by attacking those muslim terrorists. Egyptian forces try to shield the muslim terrorists. Egyptian personnel get killed. Simple enough, right? So now every political group in Egypt is outraged about ISRAEL’S actions and demanding that the IDF personnel who defended Israel be handed over to Egypt for trials? Who was at fault? The Egyptian government and the Egyptian Army! THAT is the new regime that Barack Obama is selling the world’s finest tanks to. Israel actually took the completely unnecessary step of apologizing for the deaths of the Egyptian personnel, but that placated none of the Muslim Brotherhood lovers.

N) It isn’t often that The Crawfish agrees with Alan Dershowitz, but this is one of those times.

O) When the leftists run out Warren Buffett to say millionaires need to pay more taxes, they think they have the trump card. Of course, when the numbers are posted, the folly of the left is exposed yet again. It’s the spending, stupid!

P) So how has that fundamental transformation of our nation, also known as hopeandchange, worked? Are we better off at all, or are we now on a road to ruin unless we can elect some adults in 2012?

Q) Barack the Magnificent says that he wants immediate action on some free trade agreements in order to create jobs in America. That’s funny, since he has refused to submit those agreements to Congress for a vote for the past thirty one months. Actually, those agreements were signed by President Bush, but the Democrat-controlled House and Senate (under the leadership of Red Nanny P-Lousy, Dingy Harry, and some guy named Barack Obama) refused to allow them to come up for a vote!

R) This bit of news hit The Crawfish family personally. We are regulars at Scarborough Faire, and we knew Will Ross. Go with God, Will. We’ll raise a toast to you on opening day in April.

S) Another death this week shook us. Although we didn’t know him personally, we knew his food and his very public stance on illegal immigration. Joey Vento died of a heart attack on Tuesday evening. Joey was the owner of Geno’s Steaks, one of the two iconic landmark cheesesteak stands in downtown Philly.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The Constitution on which our Union rests, shall be administered by me [as President] according to the safe and honest meaning contemplated by the plain understanding of the people of the United States at the time of its adoption – a meaning to be found in the explanations of those who advocated, not those who opposed it, and who opposed it merely lest the construction should be applied which they denounced as possible.” – Thomas Jefferson, letter to Mesrs. Eddy, Russel, Thurber, Wheaton, and Smith, 1801

The Constitution of the United States

Saturday, August 20, 2011

8-20-2011 The Weekend Claw

“The society that puts equality before freedom will end up with neither. The society that puts freedom before equality will end up with a great measure of both.” –Milton Friedman

A) Union thug violence has skyrocketed under the leadership of Barack Obama and his union-owned White House. Here we have yet another incident in the Rust Belt of a business owner who has helped his employees resist unionization, but has suffered repeated vandalism, threats, stalking, and now attempted murder. Obama’s favorite criminal gang, the purple shirts of the SEIU are seen here attacking Paul Blart Mall Cop at a Than Franthithco area mall. It is past high time to start putting union organizers and leaders in prison for the actions that they encourage and sanction.

B) Here is yet another episode of a mob of black youths attacking a white woman. Will Eric Holder take note of this racist hate crime? Oh, that’s right. He doesn’t believe in prosecuting black animals who victimize whites. These are “my people”, according to the Affirmative Action Attorney General. Michelle(***sigh***) Malkin was on Sean Hannity’s show talking about these mobs, and of course she was deluged with hate e-mail calling her a racist and a whore because she happened to notice the skin color of 99% of the perps. Someone started keeping track of these flash mobs around the country, with sources.

C) Janet Incompetano’s Department of Homeland Insecurity gets two mentions this time ‘round. First of all, the Department has stopped all deportations at the unConstitutional direction of The Chosen One, and subjecting each and every case to a number of criteria all designed to allow as many illegals as possible to stay in the nation. “This case-by-case approach will enhance public safety”, Incompetano bleated. No, Janet, deporting each and every illegal now in the nation and completely securing our border to prevent more from surviving illegal entry attempts would enhance public safety, and would open up puh-lenty of jobs for our welfare hordes. This move also puts into effect almost all of the provisions of the DREAM Act that Congress has rejected already, and thus is a violation of the Constitution’s separation of powers. Harry Reid even noted it that way in his statement: “I am especially pleased about the impact these new policies will have on those who would benefit from the DREAM Act. ... We lose a lot by sending them back to countries they do not know.”

D) Next comes the latest Public Service Advertisement from DHS, unveiled by Incompetano herself, reminding the public to report anything that looks suspicious. As is the norm for this racist and politically correct Administration, the terrorists in the ad are a white woman and a white man. With 99% of the world’s terrorism being committed by muslims, and 75% of the violent acts in America being perpetrated by blacks or latino gangbangers, this bunch has to make the perps look like people who could be Tea Party supporters. We can’t go insulting Obama’s core voting blocs, can we?

E) Representative Mike Coffman (R-CO) is standing up for the American taxpayer and real Americans. He is calling for the repeal of a section of the Voting Rights Act of 1973 that mandated voting ballots be printed in foreign languages if a number of non-English speaking people live in an area. To vote, one must be a citizen. To become a citizen, one must be proficient in writing, speaking, and understanding English. Ergo, in order to vote, one must be proficient in English and therefore have no need for a ballot to be printed in any other language. Of course, Democrats will point out that noticing this is raaaaaacist!

F) With the exception of the debt “deal” vote, I find myself supporting Lieutenant Colonel Allen West more and more each day. It is too bad that the black community listens to people like Maxine Waters, Charlie Rangel, Sheila Jackson-Lee, Jesse, the not-so-reverend Al, and Calypso Louie instead of Representative West.

G) Senator Frank “The Louse” Lautenberg let loose with an incredibly stoooopid statement, even if it is exactly what the Democrats are in effect saying on a regular basis. Since he is worth over $50 million, maybe he should start with himself.

H) Arizona’s Governor Jan Brewer has found Obama’s jobs plan. It may not create many NEW jobs, but it does protect about 15,000,000 current ones.

I) Israel is getting attacked yet again. This time with multiple strikes including mortar and rocket fire from both Gaza and from within Egypt. Don’t expect any condemnation from the Administration or the media…unless return fire from the IDF happens to kill a muslim.

J) The Crawfish knows one city in which he isn’t going to order Chinese food anytime soon.

K) As long as we’re in Colorado, let’s look at some serious business. The Obama Administration is using the federal bureaucracy and the Endangered Species Act to stifle energy production in Colorado. They have classified three flowers as endangered or protected, and they just happen to grow only in an area that has large oil and natural gas deposits. They are also looking to give the area a “critical habitat” designation. Nobody really cares about these flowers, but the envirowackos do care about preventing energy exploration.

L) Maxine “Bank Bailout” Waters and the Congressional Racist Caucus are miffed at The Chosen One. It seems that his Magical Misery Short Bus Tour isn’t visiting the Projects. He’s only visiting with his white half.

M) I would make some comments about this video, but all I really need to say is that it is Calypso Louie. I’ll let y’all tear it to shreds in the comments.

N) I can’t make up stories like this one, but I almost didn’t feature it because it doesn’t look good for the city I call home.

O) The Affirmative Action Attorney General’s Injustice Department is just starting to understand what a world of poo they’ve gotten themselves into. Eleven more violent crime scenes in the US are now directly related to the Fast & Furious weapons that were allowed to walk, and that number will go much higher if this scandal is ever properly investigated. Does this signal even more promotions?

P) His Majesty says that he will present a plan after Labor Day to cut the deficit and get our debt under control. He says his plan will also “provide folks who need help the help they need”, by which he means that he intends to grow the entitlements, even though he said everything will be on the table. Speaker Boehner replied with: “The House has passed legislation to remove barriers to private-sector job creation, ease job-destroying regulations, expand American energy production and significantly reduce our unsustainable debt burden. The House has led, but unfortunately we cannot act alone.” So the question is, which side talks the game, and which side acts to solve the problem?

Q) Not only are King Barry and Queen Michelle Antoinette having yet another luxury vacation in Martha’s Vineyard, but the Queen and her Princesses decided that they wanted to arrive a few hours ahead of the King, so they got their own Air Force flight and Secret Service (plus local and state police) motorcade. This cost the American taxpayers an additions $100,000.00+, and also contributed many more carbon emissions to hack off The Prophet Algoracle. What was that about reducing unnecessary and wasteful spending by the government? Why isn’t there a line of GOP Congresscritters in front of microphones on Crapitol Hill blasting this extravagance? I mean just look at the photos in this story of a huge motorcade and the local populace getting frisked because he wanted to go to the local bookstore. Hasn’t he ever heard of e-readers and e-books?

R) As long as we’re talking about wasteful and stooooopid government spending, just read about this mobile phone app. How much did the government spend on this? (cue the infomercial voice) But wait, there’s more! There are sooo many wasteful projects funded by our government every year, including all sorts of research studies and such at universities, which should be right up near the top of the list for the Super Committee to look at. They may be a few hundred thousand here, a million there, but they all add up to something that can be a start toward the needed $1.5 trillion in cuts. Toss in a repeal of Obamacare and it is completed!

S) The headline of this article got my blood boiling, but when I started reading it I realized that Representative Upton is right on target with what most of us conservatives have been saying. People who are already on Social Insecurity, Medicare, Medicaid, etc. Should not get their benefits cut in order to reduce the deficit. FUTURE recipients, who have time to plan for the future and take personal responsibility for their retirement years, will see reductions in benefits or a delay before they can receive them. Now if we’re talking about “entitlements” such as welfare, Food Stamps, gummint housing, and such...CHOP LIKE MAD!

T) There’s a huge scandal brewing in the world of college athletics, and it involves a member of Bill Clinton’s Cabinet. Donna Shalala was Clinton’s Secretary of Health and Human Services for eight years. Soon after he left office, she became the President of the University of Miami. Now a Miami booster, who is in prison for a Ponzi scheme, is admitting that he gave all sorts of illegal benefits to athletes from “The U”, including cash, cars, yacht trips, sex parties, flat screen televisions, prostitutes, jewelry, nightclub outings, restaurant outings, and even an abortion for a stripper that one of the athletes impregnated. Yes, the legacy of the Bubba Administration lives on.

U) Here is a powerful piece by James Lewis regarding liberals and moral cowardice. Let’s see if any liberals can refute any of it.

V) I’m not saying See-BS is a biased organization or anything, but their online souvenir shop has a lot of Barack Obama stuff in it. I guess they just haven’t received their shipment of Sarah Palin books and t-shirts yet.

W) Here is Friday’s Question of the Day. I think we all know why.

X) Continuing the liberal war against The Crawfish’s state will be facing rolling blackouts next year because of Obama’s EPA. Now watch the Dems blame Rick Perry when the blackouts start.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The Constitution on which our Union rests, shall be administered by me [as President] according to the safe and honest meaning contemplated by the plain understanding of the people of the United States at the time of its adoption – a meaning to be found in the explanations of those who advocated, not those who opposed it, and who opposed it merely lest the construction should be applied which they denounced as possible.” – Thomas Jefferson, letter to Mesrs. Eddy, Russel, Thurber, Wheaton, and Smith, 1801

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

8-17-2011 The Weekly Claw

The wheels on the short bus go ‘round and ‘round…

A) Once again I’m asking my readers to consider making a contribution to this cause. A Navy pilot is running in the 2011 Marine Corps Marathon and raising money for the Injured Marine Semper Fi Fund. The Crawfish has contributed, as has at least one of my readers and fellow bloggers. I would love to see some more familiar names on the list, even if it is just for $10.

B) Expect to see this exact same scenario played out here in the USA in the near future. A 13-year old boy steals a golf club and uses it to smash up a store. The mother, who has ELEVEN children but has no baby-daddy in the house, lives on “benefits” (she’s a welfare brood mare). She is ashamed of her son, but says it is all the fault of the government. Wrong answer. The problem is that YOU don’t know how to keep your legs together! It is the fault of those who committed the violence and their families. The government is considering cutting off the “benefits” of those convicted, but this measure is being criticized by liberals. The Crawfish says that they should start by cutting off the benefits to the whole families of those convicted of rioting. This is what happens when you give people something for nothing.

C) Neal Boortz reminded us of another “benefits” leech. This woman has five children by four sperm donors, none of whom are living with their children. She saved her “benefits” instead of using them to better the lives of her children. The “benefits” instead paid for her to go from a 34A to a 34DD, and more of them will go to get those things reduced 25 years from now and to pay for back surgery if she ever gets off of the waiting list.

D) There’s also a case of a little girl whose mother allowed her to do sexy bikini photo spreads at age 12. By the time she was 15, her mother was allowing the girl’s 17-year old boyfriend to sleep over. Now, still 15, the girl is pregnant, and the mother is HAPPY about it. Why? Because she will now get a bigger home from the government.

E) The Crawfish gives a final salute to Albert “Doc” Brown, who passed away this week at age 105.

F) So Michelle Bachmann won the Iowa Straw Poll and the Paulbots came in 2nd. Why do we care? This event is a complete non-event! Only 16,000 people get involved. Wait, that’s the number of MEDIA people involved. About 16,800 people “voted” in this event, but every voting ticket has to be purchased. The campaigns purchase the tickets and bribe people to come to the state fair to use the tickets to vote. The winner gets absolutely nothing, since this is not a primary. So why is this event important to anybody except the organizers and concessionaires at the Iowa State Fair? I really don’t get it.

G) Barack Obama is out on his “Magical Misery Tour”, as dubbed by Mitt Romney. He has the taxpayers paying for it, since he claims that it is not really a campaign tour, including paying over a million bucks for his armored bus. How many of you noticed that the bus does NOT have an American flag anywhere on it? The Crawfish finds this completely unacceptable, especially since should be riding the SHORT BUS!

H) The silence of the mainstream media is astounding considering the extreme outlaw behavior being promoted by union bosses and acted out by union thugs in the Verizon strike. While the rest of the world has entered the 21st century, unions are stuck in the 1930s.

I)The Obama Administration, and the rest of the Democratic Party, is adhering to a philosophy attributed to both Lenin and Josef Goebbels. If you tell a lie often enough, it becomes the truth. The Administration has now sent Agriculture Secretary Vilsack out to bleat the talking point that Food Stamps and other unemployment handouts are good for the economy because they create jobs. Right, giving people incentive to NOT work makes them go get a job.

J) The idiots running California can’t get their spending under control, but they sure know how to control everything else. Now there is proposed legislation mandating the use of fitted sheets on all hotel mattresses. Why does the state care if a hotel uses a fitted sheet and a flat sheet or two flat sheets? What difference does it make to the taxpayers? If people want luxury sheets, they can spend their money in hotels that use them. Let the free market decide!

K) Meanwhile, in the suburbs of DC, we have yet another flash mob, made up entirely of blacks, robbing a 7-11 en masse. The clerk hit the panic alarm, but the cops didn’t show up until well after the fact (when seconds count, the police are only minutes away). The cops took a look at the tape and said that there was nothing they could do. You can’t make any identifications off of a surveillance tape. Really? The faces are quite clear! Then again, this is the DC area and the shop owner is from the middle east. Eric Holder has already set the precedent that blacks are not to be prosecuted when their victims are not black. To prosecute would be raaaaaaaaacist! Since we have noticed this, we are also raaaaaaaacist.

L) The continuing stories of tax fraud and other improprieties involving the property and mansion owned by the Obamas in Chicago just keep popping up. Is there anything that they have been involved in that was 100% legit? They really do make the Clintons look honest.

M) Senator Patrick “Leaky” Leahy (D-VT) wants to suspend all aid to units of the Israeli Defense Force because they might have committed human rights abuses against the terrorists of Hamas and Hezbollah. Leahy, who STILL has never been prosecuted for giving classified information to the Washington Compost and other liberal media organizations repeatedly, has no problem with giving aid to the terrorists under the guise of the “Palestinian Authority” despite their record of atrocities, but Israel must be punished. Why do American Jews support the political party that wants all Jews in Israel to die?

N) Leave it to a city that does everything it can to subvert the Constitution to start shutting down cell phone service because of a possible protest. The left wing loons of Than Franthithco saw that happen over the weekend. First Amendment, anyone?

O) “We’re going to have to take on entitlements, and I think we’ve got to do it quickly. We’re going to have a lot of work to do, so I can’t guarantee that we’re going to do it in the next two years, but I’d like to do it in my first term as president.” When Barack Obama said that in 2008, the nation figured he meant reforming entitlements to make them leaner, less expensive, and less filled with fraud. Nope, his agenda was to put them all on steroids.

P) Here’s a new headline: “Obama Kills American Jobs, Bows to China Again!” The Obama Administration has formally rejected Taiwan’s request to buy new F-16 fighter jets, because the Chinese government still adheres to the alternate reality that has Taiwan being part of mainland China. The program would have kept 16,000 Americans at work and brought in over $768,000,000.00 in federal tax revenue, but it would have helped one of our traditional allies so it was a non-starter with this Administration.

Q) I know it will be hard for y’all to believe this, but Barack Obama has once again lied about private sector jobs and the economy. He stated that under his leadership, the private sector has created 2 million jobs. Obviously, when looking at the stats from his own Department of Labor, he (intentionally) overlooked the negative sign. On top of that, he claimed that the economy started a recovery under his Administration, but that damned tsunami and the Arab Spring and Michelle’s hangnail and his faulty putter and a few other things have slowed it down, since EVRYBODY knows that HIS policies can NEVER fail.

R) The three ATF supervisors who ran the Fast and Furious/Gunrunner operations have been dealt with. They kept these programs going on long after they spun out of control and now they have paid the price. All three have been…PROMOTED! You see, none of them have admitted that Eric Holder was involved, and to keep their mouths shut, they had to get promoted.

S) His Majesty King Barack I has absolutely no experience with business, with the possible exception of being a community organizer for strikes, so why is he trying to tell the automakers that they need to “understand the market”? “You can't just make money on SUVs and trucks. There is a place for SUVs and trucks, but as gas prices keep on going up, you have got to understand the market. People are going to try to save money.” If trucks and SUVs are the top sellers, then the automakers need to build more of them. If the Volt, Prius, and Smart Car were on heavy backorder, the automakers would be ramping up production on those models. Just because The Chosen One WANTS America to drive smaller, lighter, less safe cars doesn’t mean that America wants those pieces of dung. Oh wait…that’s capitalism. Why would he understand that?

T) I give the odds of this experiment working for more than a decade as about 1:1,000,000,000,000,000,000. Someone will get power hungry or they will start smoking the socialist utopian bong.

U) While those of us who don’t drive the most fuel-efficient vehicles might appreciate the thought of a system that would equalize our gas taxes with those who get high mileage, the Big Brother aspects of this proposal make it a non-starter. If any state tried it, there would be immediate lawsuits based upon the same mythological “right of privacy” that was the lynchpin of the Roe v. Wade case.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The Constitution on which our Union rests, shall be administered by me [as President] according to the safe and honest meaning contemplated by the plain understanding of the people of the United States at the time of its adoption – a meaning to be found in the explanations of those who advocated, not those who opposed it, and who opposed it merely lest the construction should be applied which they denounced as possible.” – Thomas Jefferson, letter to Mesrs. Eddy, Russel, Thurber, Wheaton, and Smith, 1801

The Constitution of the United States

Saturday, August 13, 2011

8-13-2011 The Weekend Claw

This week, The Crawfish’s home metropolis saw the end of a 40-day streak of 100+ degree temps, the return of the Dallas Cowboys to the field of Cowboys Stadium, and some actual water falling from the sky. Life is getting better.

A) The Crawfish doesn’t say things like this lightly, but Barack Obama is a scumbag. The families of 19 of the 30 Navy SEALs whose remains were returned to the US on Wednesday officially requested NO MEDIA COVERAGE, which includes photographers, at the “dignified transfer” ceremony at Dover Air Force Base. The official policy is that is any family members object to media coverage, it is forbidden. B. Hussein Obama turned the arrival of the caskets into a photo op for himself and his 2012 campaign, and had the White House Press Office distribute that photo to the media, while the White House web site posted it as their “Photo of the Day”. This is beyond disgusting.

B) The most recent Gallop poll shows that muslims are the group that approves of Barack Obama’s performance in the highest percentage, with 80% approval. I’m sure this will shock somebody, but probably not anybody who regularly reads my columns or who knows the reality of the Followers of the Pedophilic False Prophet. If he had really left that religion, they wouldn’t approve of him, but would be calling for his execution, since leaving Islam is the highest sin of that death cult. The fact that 65% of America’s Jews support Obama goes to show that America’s Jews are JINOs who hate Israel.

C) In a 2-1 ruling, the 11th Circuit Court of Appeals in Atlanta gave a partial blow to Obamacare. The ruling states that the individual mandate is unConstitutional, but that the rest of the law can stand (even though the individual mandate is the lynchpin of the whole system). This is big because it is the first time that a judge put on a court by a Democrat (Clinton) has ruled against Obama. Of course, the Super Committee would do well to consider repealing Obamacare in its entirety, since it will cost over a trillion in the next decade.

D) The ultra-liberal Contract for the American Dream has nothing to do with the traditional American Dream, as Neal Boortz so poignantly puts it. It is rather a dream of government control over every bit of life in our nation.

E) Meanwhile, a HARVARD study shows that the best way to get debt reduction is to cut spending and lower taxes. Yes, HARVARD has to admit that conservatism works and liberalism doesn’t.

F) There appears to be some shenanigans going on in a federal trial in Arizona. A man is on trial for making illegal firearms purchases including the guns that killed Border Patrol Agent Brian A. Terry. The US Attorney has denied the family’s request to be considered crime victims, a request that is routinely granted. The US Attorney, it seems, has a severe conflict of interest in the situation. His office was in charge of Operation Fast & Furious, and that is how the defendant got the weapons. He says that crime victim “is not any particular person, but society in general.” The family has already stated that they will be filing a wrongful death lawsuit against the government, so this US Attorney is trying to cover his butt and that of the Affirmative Action Attorney General.

G) I’m not sure if this is a fair comparison (to Putin), but it does explain a lot.

H) As if y’all need any more examples of the media being less than fair and impartial, it appears that the mainstream media is taking orders from and defending D!CK Durban. When a conservative reporter dared to ask D!CK a tough question, they had him thrown out of the press event. They also failed to report the confrontation, because D!CK said to them: “You guys aren’t going to cover this are you?”

I) Yes, the riots in England are made up of welfare mobs that are upset about their free ride possibly coming to an end. They might actually have to WORK for a living. Expect this same behavior in the USA when adults finally take over DC and cut off the unsustainable New Deal and Great Society programs. The Great Society was supposed to be part of a War on Poverty. Forty five years and trillions of dollars later, the poverty rate never changed. The only thing that changed is that there is now a permanent underclass that has no work ethic and a high moocher ethic. It has also destroyed the black family unit in our nation.

J) Dan Calabrese of The North Star National asks “Is America Going to Make It? Are You Sure?” As long as we have liberals in control, the issue is definitely in doubt.

K) All I can say about this column from American Spectator is…this is what I’ve been saying here for years!

L) No, I did not watch the GOP debate. I caught a few snippets online, but not enough to comment on anything except for one exchange. As much as I like Ron Paul on domestic and fiscal policy, he proved that he is a complete idiot on foreign policy. He has no problems with Iran developing nuclear weaponry and supporting terrorist groups like Hamas and Hezbollah. If those nukes get developed, the H groups will in turn detonate those nukes in Tel Aviv and Haifa. He said that sanctions always lead to war, but refuses to notice that Iran has been fighting us and Israel since the return of Khomeini. Iran supported and supplied most of the Iraqi insurgent groups that fought our people, even allowing the short, black diaperheaded mullah of the worst group to run the operation from Iran. Iran supports and supplies Al Qaida and the Taliban in Afghanistan. Paul even compared Iran to the USSR during the Cold War, and noted that we talked to the Soviets. Representative Paul, the Soviet Union was run by people with sanity, who did not believe in muslim martyrism, who did not repeatedly call for the annihilation of one of our allies like Iran has done with Israel! There is a HUGE difference!

M) The Post Office is losing $8 billion AGAIN this year, so layoffs and other cost-cutting measures are definitely needed. Of course, the unions are demanding that no layoffs happen and none of their benefits get touched. Since the union contracts have clauses stating that layoffs are forbidden unless Congress authorizes them, don’t expect the USPS to do anything other than lose billions more until the adults can take over Congress and the White House in January 2013.

N) Considering most of the women I’ve seen working at those establishments, do NOT expect me to ever order “extra sugar”!!

O) It really is astounding the lengths that the lamestream media will go to in order to prop up the Democratic Party. After their recall efforts failed in Wisconsin, the peacock’s people said it was “an amazing win for Democrats.” That’s like saying Super Bowl 45 was an amazing win for the Pittsburgh Steelers. True, the Green Bay Packers took home the Vince Lombardy Trophy, but it was an amazing win for Pittsburgh.

P) The Crawfish had to laugh at The Chosen One on Thursday. He had a speech in which he was telling Congress to get past their differences and send him a highway bill! The Blithering Idiot already got a huge highway bill. It was called…uh…lemme think…er…oh, yeah. It was called the STIMULUS BILL! Yes, it was to be filled with “shovel ready” construction and infrastructure jobs, wasn’t it?

Q) I’m not saying that the government is spying on us and is afraid of anybody who does NOT want to be dependent upon government, but that’s just because the government is doing such a good job of broadcasting those notions without my help. First they wanted citizens to send in e-mail reports about people who dared to oppose Obamacare, then they demanded that all gun shops anywhere near the border to report multiple gun sales, and now this. Outrageous! This is quite typical of how statist dictatorships build their power. Our good friend Gunny G has some comments of his own on this matter.

R) This is why we should outlaw malls. They just seem to bring out the most well-intentioned weirdoes.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The Constitution on which our Union rests, shall be administered by me [as President] according to the safe and honest meaning contemplated by the plain understanding of the people of the United States at the time of its adoption – a meaning to be found in the explanations of those who advocated, not those who opposed it, and who opposed it merely lest the construction should be applied which they denounced as possible.” – Thomas Jefferson, letter to Mesrs. Eddy, Russel, Thurber, Wheaton, and Smith, 1801

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

8-10-2011 The Weekly Claw

We go into the mid-week with the good guys winning, the lefties reduced to sputtering complete nonsense, and the youth of London thinking they live in South-Central or Detroit.

A) The Democrats and their union thugs tried to recall six GOP State Senators on Tuesday. They needed to win three of those races, while winning both of the next week’s recall elections for two of the Dim-ocrat Fleebagger State Senators. The unions spent huge amounts of dues money extorted from the workers in many states, but lost this battle, again. Maybe it is time for the union members to replace their leaders, who care about union power and solidarity, but not what is actually good for their members and the nation.

B) Blogger Garnet92 has definitely done his homework. Here are a couple of in-depth blog posts detailing the 17 things most critics have against Rick Perry, with the full story on all of them, then he laid out the case FOR Rick Perry. Well done.

C) Here we go again. News-weak Magazine is now saying that Michelle Bachmann and all of the Tea Party folks are “radical” because they want to (gasp) actually shrink the government instead of just slightly slowing its growth. I guess that means well over half of the country is officially “radical”, as poll after poll shows the taxpaying public wanting a smaller government. Of course the 49% who do NOT pay taxes are mostly still believers in that hopey-changey thing.

D) Slobbering Bawney Fwank actually said that the downgrade by S&P was because we spend too much on our military. Really? Military spending as a percentage of GDP is lower than at any time since the 30s, and we know what kind of shape our forces were in at the beginning of WW2. UnConstitutional entitlement programs cost much more than the military, and their unfunded mandates are growing exponentially.

E) ABC’s Cokehead Roberts actually blamed the credit downgrade on the Constitution. Well, Dear Leader DID say it was a “flawed” document.

F) On Monday, King Putt took some time away from the golf course to blame Republicans for the downgrade, call for more taxes on those who don’t pay their fair share, increased unemployment benefits, and throw another $105 million into the completely useless “relief” efforts in Somalia. Then he went off to more high-dollar fundraisers. The only job Barack Obama has ever taken seriously is campaigning. His remarks once again blamed the Japanese tsunami for the downgrade, along with people who drew lines in the sand, although his own lines in the sand are, like him, completely blameless. We are still waiting on any serious budget-cutting plans from the Democrats in the House, Senate, or White House that do anything about entitlement reform.

G) When Monday evening’s fundraisers rolled around, he was back to his old stand-by tactic…Blame Bush! “We do have a serious problem in terms of debt and deficit, and much of it I inherited.” Is he REALLY going to continue that line of bovine fecal matter? He didn’t inherit the so-called “stimulus”, Obamacare, QE1, and QE2. The biggest deficit under Bush, coincidentally when he had a Congress run by Pelosi, Reid, and Obama, was less than HALF the deficit from last year or for this year. QUIT LYING AND MAN-UP! Now we know that will never happen, because The Chosen One is perfect and blameless. Our good friend Gunny G has a post up showing just some of the entities and events blamed by Obama recently. Google even reports that “Obama blames” has over six million hits.

H) Jeanne Francoise Kerry-Heinz blamed the downgrade on the GOP and the Tea Party, which brought about a swift counter from Allen West, in which he slams Tax Cheat Timmy, saying that when THAT refrigerator door opens, the light doesn’t come on!

I) Former Fed Chairman Greenspan showed us why liberals really do need to be put out of their misery. This “highly educated” person bleated that the US will never default on our debt because we can just print more money to pay. So we can just turn our currency into Monopoly money and bring back visions of the Weimar Republic, when men hauled wheelbarrows full of Marks just to buy a loaf of bread and the nation had to print a 1 billion Mark note.

J) Fat communist pig Michael Mooreon responded to the downgrade by calling for Obama to arrest the CEO of Standard & Poor’s. Hey Lardbutt, the CEO of S&P isn’t the one illegally spending trillions of dollars in violation of the Constitution and all economic sense.

K) “If Congress fails to extend the payroll-tax cut and the unemployment-insurance benefits that I’ve called for, it could mean 1 million fewer jobs.” Huh? That quote is from Dear Leader’s call for another round of so-called “stimulus” spending. Yes, now that he has another blank check, he wants to repeat another one of his failures. Evidently, he and Red Nanny both believe that drawing unemployment should count as having a job. Wrong answer, Kenyan Keynesian! If you take away the incentive to be a lazy leech, those people might actually get jobs! Open up your nearest big-city newspaper. There are jobs available!

L) In response to our credit downgrade and debt crisis, liberal groups (, unions, Rebuild the Dream, etc) are saying that the proper course of action at this time is to…wait for it…wait…SPEND AND TAX MORE! They are proposing a new “stimulus” called “Contract for the American Dream”. These people really do have brain disorders.

M) Only in the United States do you get lawsuits over something like this. Is the USOC going to sue all of the mapmakers in the US over the Olympic Penninsula in Washington State?

N) Is this the reason America’s liberals want to slash our defense budget?

O) Neal Boortz has a plan to turn our economy around. The only point that I disagree with is ending the war on drugs. President Crawfish would use Agent Orange on all of the poppy fields of Asia and the pot farms of Central and South America.

P) The unemployment rate of 9.1% is just an illusion. The real numbers are worse, but the government doesn’t want those numbers publicized.

Q) Newt Gingrich has finally hit upon something useful. It also happens to be something The Crawfish has been wanting for a long time. He wants the GOP to start up a Tenth Amendment Task Force, which would propose ways to enforce the Tenth and get DC out of the business of the states. This isn’t something for his own campaign, but rather something the whole GOP can rally around. As I have stated repeatedly, Newt is a terrible candidate for the Presidency, but he is a great idea man. He could be the next Karl Rove, only smarter.

R) This guy was trying his best to uphold the Austin, TX, city motto: “Keep Austin Weird!” His grade, unfortunately, is an EPIC FAIL! I don’t even wanna think about those blisters.

S) The Smithsonian’s new “Department of Innovation” has published their new logo. There is a slight problem with it. It shows three interlocking gears in a pattern that will now allow any of them to move. That’s what happens when you staff a government with people who have no experience outside of government or academia.

T) Mayor Michael Nutter of Filthadelphia deserves credit. He called out the black youth of the city after a wave of “flash mobs” that were almost 100% comprised of blacks. Another positive sign is that the local NAACP backed him up. “Take those God-darn hoodies down, especially in the summer. Pull your pants up and buy a belt ‘cause no one wants to see your underwear or the crack of your butt. If you walk into somebody’s office with your hair uncombed and a pick in the back, and your shoes untied, and your pants half down, tattoos up and down your arms and on your neck, and you wonder why somebody won’t hire you? They don’t hire you ‘cause you look like you’re crazy. You have damaged your own race.” The Mayor has also issued a curfew for teenagers in the city. The local ACLU is backing him up for now, which they would definitely NOT have done with a white Republican mayor anywhere in America.

U) It is bad enough that this moron decided to commit suicide, but why did he have to endanger and traumatize others, including children, when he did it? The entire Crawfish family has skated on that ice, and I can definitely say that we weren’t looking 4 floors up (ice rink is on basement level and the fool jumped from the 3rd level) for objects falling down on top of us.

V) You have to admire the spunk and ingenuity of the Aussies. Just think, our country was once like that, until decades of liberal control ruined it.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“The Constitution on which our Union rests, shall be administered by me [as President] according to the safe and honest meaning contemplated by the plain understanding of the people of the United States at the time of its adoption – a meaning to be found in the explanations of those who advocated, not those who opposed it, and who opposed it merely lest the construction should be applied which they denounced as possible.” – Thomas Jefferson, letter to Mesrs. Eddy, Russel, Thurber, Wheaton, and Smith, 1801

The Constitution of the United States

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Hiroshima Day 2011 The Weekend Claw

My apologies to Mrs. AL and the rest who really wish that I had less to write about. Maybe next week….

A) American ingenuity PAYS OFF AGAIN! The Crawfish gives a big salute to Ernie Fessenden and Kevin Guy for saving the lives of American soldiers!

B) Attention my friends! We must all be extremely careful about what we say on the web now. The Obamites are now monitoring the web, especially social networks, for “extremist propaganda.” Of course, this means that they will ignore everything said by the Democrats and muslims, while focusing on all conservative bloggers and Tea Party groups. Big Brother is watching you, again.

C) This has to be one of the funniest postings by Michelle (***sigh***) Malkin in quite a while, and the reader comments keep the laughs going. The Top 10 Obama Birthday Party games. It is better than any Letterman Top 10 list.

D) The Crawfish grew up thinking of attending Southern Methodist University. This news makes me like the Mustangs even more!

E) Now that the Kick the Can of Debt Down the Road Bill has passed, we can expect the Democrats to start kicking their campaign into high gear. Step one is to start praising the economy, even if it is still in the toilet. Oh wait, it has already started! Debbie the Ditz says that the Obamites are “continuing to get this economy turned around” and that “We’re creating jobs each month in the private sector.” Well, they have succeeded in turning the economy around. It is now precisely 180 degrees from where it should be. As for jobs in the private sector, the government doesn’t create a single private sector job. Even if she means that the Obama Economy is creating jobs in the private sector, 5 to 10 jobs at McDonald’s per month just won’t cut it!

F) So how has the market taken this debt deal? If it was a good deal, the Dow Jones would be on the way up. Unfortunately for America, on Thursday the Dow did something unseen since the salad days of James Earl Carter, it lost ground for a ninth consecutive day. Not only did it go down, it plummeted 513 points, or 4%, in the worst day of trading since 2008. The Dow Jones Industrial Average is now below where it was to start the year. Can you say Wreckovery Summer? The only reason that the Dow posted a 60 point gain on Friday was the news out of Italy, where the leaders have decided to actually vote on a constitutional balanced budget amendment and other fiscal reforms.

G) In related news, Obama celebrated that wonderful birthday present Thursday night.

H) White House Propaganda Minister Carney shrugged off the economic train wreck by merely saying “markets go up and down”, before blaming the problems on the earthquake and tsunami in Japan and the unrest in the Middle East. Of course, we KNOW it can’t be the fault of Keynesian economics and a spend-crazy government!

I) Back to the debt deal for a moment. The first part of the deal raised the debt ceiling by $400 billion. In less than 3 days, Barack Obama has already used up 60% of that amount. He’s going to need a debt limit increase before that unConstitutional “super committee” even gets named!

J) The leeches WANT their children to continue in their mooching footsteps! Parents (in that community it is almost exclusively one per child) in Atlanta are actually defending the principal and teachers at a school where massive cheating, by the teachers, happened on state tests. Obviously, they don’t want their children to actually feel the need and desire to succeed on their own, since that would be “acting white”. Success by the chirrun might lead to a lack of welfare checks.

K) Like I said on Wednesday, my Senator is officially an idiot. He actually says that the debt deal is a step in the right direction, even though there are no real cuts outside of defense, but there are real tax hikes. Puh-leeeeeze let me win the next Mega Millions so I can mount a primary challenge against this moron RINO.

L) Even Leon Panetta, hardly a conservative, says that the defense cuts in the debt deal “would do real damage to our security, our troops and their families, and our ability to protect the nation.” Does that disturb Harry Reid, Chuck U Schumer, Nancy Pelosi, D!ck Durban, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, or Barack Obama? On the contrary, that is why THEY are celebrating!

M) The debt deal legislation violates the Constitution, but since Obama, Reid, Upchuck, D!ck, and the bunch are happy about it, you probably had that figured out already.

N) Here is my take on the debt deal, summed up with three words.

O) Now that it is over, Obama says: “I’ll continue also to fight for what the American people care most about: new jobs, higher wages and faster economic growth.” I think we’ve heard that before, but I could be wrong.

P) Here’s another $175 million that can be cut from the federal budget immediately. Why should I pay thousands of dollars to give people the luxury of not having to drive over an hour and a half to an airport? I know that $175 million is chump change in this battle, but if we can keep finding this kind of useless expenditure, we can make a solid dent in the problem.

Q) You will be absolutely shocked to see that Barack Obama has already received the endorsement for the Presidential race in 2012 by his true political party. No, their symbol isn’t a jackass, but their endorsee is one.

R) The union that I am forced to pay dues to is now officially guilty of extortion. The IAM has told the workers of South Carolina that they will end their NLRB action against Boeing if the workers join the IAM.

S) Free cell phones and internet are now officially “civil rights” according to the Democrats. I’m looking through my copy of the Constitution, and I just don’t see where the government has the authority to tax me in order to provide such luxuries to those who are too lazy to get a job or who spend all of their money on drugs, booze, smokes, and X-Boxes.

T) The liberals are calling Constitutionalists “terrorists”, but who really is terrorizing Americans? That would be the liberals and their federal bureaucracy. Did you know that it is now a federal crime to sell fresh milk? Natural foods are strictly verboten, thanks to the Food Safety Modernization Act of 2009, brought to you by those brainiac statists Nancy P-Lousy, Harry Reid, and Barack Hussein Obama. Yes, the federal government IS in charge of every bit of your life!

U) That “terrorist”, “hostage taking”, and “gun to our head” public polling data must have been huge for the Dems. Now Upchuck Schumer is saying that the GOP is “holding hostage” and has a “gun held to the head” of the Dems in regards to an FAA funding bill. Give it a rest, moron!

V) What similarities do you see with this incident, and this one, besides the fact that both happened in localities that are not friendly to concealed handgun licenses? Do they look like the same people who perpetrated all of those violent “flash mobs” earlier this year in a bunch of “urban” areas? If you noticed, and agreed, then obviously you are a racist hostage-taking terrorist.

W) Meanwhile, MSNBC is investigating to see if the Tea Partiers are “addicts” and “delusional” because they are “pursuing goals that can’t be achieved.” Really? A Constitutional government can’t be achieved? Sanity in fiscal policy can’t be achieved? Only as long as the Dems run DC!

X) For those out there who still try to claim that Islam is a religion of peace, it isn’t and will never be as long as it is based upon the words of the unholy Quran.

Y) For all of the talk of the GOP not allowing any tax increases in the debt deal, there sure are an awful lot of tax increases on the way. Let’s point these out to Dingy Harry’s “negotiators” in the “super committee”.

Z) Here’s a good one. At a high school in Minnesota, a bunch of white kids dressed up with sagging pants and oversized jerseys, and flashed gang signs all day during homecoming week for a couple of years, imitating exactly what the black students get away with every day. A FORMER student says she was traumatized by this back in 2009, so she is suing in 2011. If she was soooo traumatized, she should have told the black students to pull up their damned pants and keep their gangland crap in the hood! She really had to go out of her way to get offended by this one, and the white kids are a bunch of racist hostage-taking terrorists.

AA) There is hope for The Crawfish on the horizon. We have an actual conservative running for the Senate seat of the retiring Kay Bailey Hutchison (Sellout-TX). Here is Tom Leppert’s take on the debt deal, and his position on a number of other issues. Note that he wants to bring the federal government back in line with the Constitution. Could it be that we will have a strong conservative leader who may eventually take over the GOP leadership in the Senate?

BB) The Army is about to start issuing some new equipment, of British design, to soldiers. It is supposedly to protect the femoral artery, but doesn’t look like it covers that area. Will this get issued to female soldiers, too? (read the comments!!!)

CC) And finally, we have proof that the right wing extremist, hostage taking, racist, gun to the head terrorists of the Tea Party WERE 100% RIGHT! Whaddya have to say NOW?

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, you can post them on my writer page on Facebook or e-mail them to the address listed on that page. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit if I use your input.

“If you blow stuff up & kill people, you're a militant or insurgent. If you want less spending & lower taxes, you're a terrorist. If conservatives want liberals to stop calling them terrorists, they should start actually killing people. Worked for the Muslims.” –Jim Treacher

The Constitution of the United States