Thursday, June 30, 2011

Stuff to cut from the budget, a Claw supplement

This info came to me in multiple e-mails.

TOTAL SAVINGS: $2.5 Trillion over next Ten Years
These are the programs (55) that the Republican House has proposed cutting. Read to the end, and if it sounds like proper fiscal management please forward to your list of folks who will approve of these cuts.....
These cuts do not require partisan consideration. They're non-essential - and BOTH parties should agree to simply eliminate all of those listed your Representative!
1) Corporation for Public Broadcasting Subsidy. $445 million annual savings.
2) "Save America's Treasures" Program. $25 million annual savings.
3) International Fund for Ireland. $17 million annual savings.
4) . Legal Services Corporation. $420 million annual savings.
5) . National Endowment for the Arts. $167.5 million annual savings.
6) National Endowment for the Humanities. $167.5 million annual savings.
7) Hope VI Program.. $250 million annual savings.
8) Amtrak Subsidies. $1.565 billion annual savings.
9) Eliminate duplicative education programs. H. R. 2274 (in last Congress), authored by Rep. McKeon, eliminates 68 at a savings of $1.3 billion annually .............get it passed, eliminate all 68
10) U.S. Trade Development Agency. $55 million annual savings.
11) Woodrow Wilson Center Subsidy. $20 million annual savings.
12) Cut in half funding for congressional printing and binding. $47 million annual savings.
13) John C. Stennis Center Subsidy. $430,000 annual savings.
14) Community Development Fund. $4.5 billion annual savings.
15) Heritage Area Grants and Statutory Aid. $24 million annual savings.
16) Cut Federal Travel Budget in Half. $7.5 billion annual savings
17) Trim Federal Vehicle Budget by 20%. $600 million annual savings.
18) Essential Air Service. $150 million annual savings.
19) Technology Innovation Program. $70 million annual savings.
20) Manufacturing Extension Partnership (MEP) Program. $125 million annual savings.
21) Department of Energy Grants to States for Weatherization. $530 million annual savings.
22) Beach Replenishment. $95 million annual savings.
23) New Starts Transit. $2 billion annual savings.
24) Exchange Programs for Alaska , Natives Native Hawaiians , and Their Historical Trading Partners in Massachusetts . $9 million annual savings
25) Intercity and High Speed Rail Grants. $2.5 billion annual savings.
26) Title X Family Planning. $318 million annual savings.
27) Appalachian Regional Commission. $76 million annual savings.
28) Economic Development Administration. $293 million annual savings.
29) Programs under the National and Community Services Act. $1.15 billion annual savings.
30) Applied Research at Department of Energy. $1.27 billion annual savings.
31) FreedomCAR and Fuel Partnership. $200 million annual savings.
32) Energy Star Program. $52 million annual savings.
33) Economic Assistance to Egypt. $250 million annually.
34) U.S. Agency for International Development. $1.39 billion annual savings.
35) General Assistance to District of Columbia. $210 million annual savings.
36) Subsidy for Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority. $150 million annual savings.
37) Presidential Campaign Fund. $775 million savings over ten years.
38) No funding for federal office space acquisition. $864 million annual savings.
39) End prohibitions on competitive sourcing of government services.
40) Repeal the Davis-Bacon Act. More than $1 billion annually.
41) IRS Direct Deposit: Require the IRS to deposit fees for some services it offers (such as processing payment plans for taxpayers) to the Treasury, instead of allowing it to remain as part of its budget. $1.8 billion savings over ten years.
42) Require collection of unpaid taxes by federal employees. $1 billion total savings. WHAT?!?!
43) Prohibit taxpayer funded union activities by federal employees. $1.2 billion savings over ten years.
44) Sell excess federal properties the government does not make use of. $15 billion total savings.
45) Eliminate death gratuity for Members of Congress.
46) Eliminate Mohair Subsidies. $1 million annual savings.
47) Eliminate taxpayer subsidies to the United Nations Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. $12.5 million annual savings
48) Eliminate Market Access Program. $200 million annual savings.
49) USDA Sugar Program. $14 million annual savings.
50) Subsidy to Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD). $93 million annual savings.
51) Eliminate the National Organic Certification Cost-Share Program. $56.2 million annual savings.
52) Eliminate fund for Obamacare administrative costs. $900 million savings.
53) Ready to Learn TV Program. $27 million savings..
54) HUD Ph.D. Program. (?)
55) Deficit Reduction Check-Off Act.
TOTAL SAVINGS: $2.5 Trillion over Ten Years

The question is: What was all this doing in the budget in the first place?

6-29-2011 The Weekly Claw

Things are really getting out of control. This column was late because my home internet (along with the phone and cable tv) was down for a couple of days. Plus, I’ve increased my frequency to twice per week, and I STILL threw out stories about:
1) Taxachusetts putting some state programs up for public investment and management so they will be run more efficiently.
2) George Soros funding groups in many states trying to get judges appointed by committees of trial lawyers instead of being elected, since the trial lawyers are a major part of the Democratic Party.
3) The California high speed rail project being rerouted through farmland so that some birds might not be disturbed.
4) His Majesty violating federal election laws by filming campaign fundraising ads in the Oval Office. (more federal lawbreaking is included)
5) The EPA using falsified science (noted in a previous column) to warn of dire consequences of sea levels rising because of Glo-Bull Warming.
6) Clinton sold the Lincoln Bedroom for campaign cash, but Obama is raffling off dinners with himself, with Gaffes Biden, and experiences with the WH chef. Can you imagine Reagan doing that?
7) The idiots in charge of Maryland making “environmental literacy” (aka Human Origin Global Warming And Similar Horrors…HOGWASH) a requirement for high school graduation.
8) Hillary! stating that the State Department was “instrumental in sealing the deal” for Lady Gaga to have a queer pride event in Rome.

A) We’ll start off with a story that illustrates something about global politics that drives The Crawfish nuts. Since 1949, the Republic of China (Taiwan) has been a distinct and separate entity from the People’s Republic of China, although neither side will officially admit to such. The PRC considers Taiwan to be a “rogue province”, while the government of Taiwan considers itself to be the legitimate government of all China. Any government that officially recognizes one must deny the existence of the other. The USA officially recognized the PRC under Richard Nixon, thereby throwing Taiwan under the bus. Since then, the USA has listed Taiwan’s status as “undetermined”, not acknowledging the PRC’s claim nor the ROC’s. The USA has kept strong commercial ties to Taiwan and has also supplied military equipment, but every military sale to Taiwan has resulted in deterioration of our relations with the PRC. The ROC wishes to buy 66 more F-16 fighter jets from Lockheed Martin Aeronautics, and has for a few years. The Bush Administration refused the sale so as to not provoke the PRC, and the Obama Administration has followed suit. Senator John Cornyn is pushing the issue, and will refuse to allow the confirmation of Obama’s Deputy SecState until the sale is allowed to go through. The times has come for the USA (and others) to step forward and officially recognize BOTH governments, publicly state the reality that the two are separate entities, and that their claims to the contrary are not based in any kind of reality and are actually quite childish.

B) The media is hounding Michelle Bachmann for confusing the birthplace of John Wayne with that of John Wayne Gacy, but they seem to be awfully silent about THIS monumental screw-up by The Chosen One. I know that if President Crawfish would ever have the distinct honor of presenting that award, I would remember whether I presented it to a living person or to their family...and I wouldn’t need a teleprompter to remind me!

C) The process of extracting natural gas from rock deposits known as “fracking” has come under fire from many groups that are opposed to American energy development, especially the over regulatory zealots who have taken over the EPA in the past two decades. In this article, the liberal myths of fracking are answered. The Crawfish’s hometown of Fort Worth has seen an abundance of fracking wells put into operation in the past few years. Our country is better off because of it.

D) This explains some of what my family goes through daily with two dachshund puppies.

E) CNN’s Candi Crowley interviewed Red Nanny P-Lousy, and allowed Nanny to spew out lie after lie about the deficit reduction talks. Nanny is DEMANDING a seat at the table (even though she shut the GOP out of all discussion of Obamacare) and DEMANDING that “balance” be part of the equation. “Balance” is the new Democrat talking point meaning tax increases, which must be implemented to prevent the deficit reduction being all “on the backs of the middle class.” The only people who would be negatively impacted by the GOP plans would be the leeches of society who live their lives sucking off the government teat and producing zero work (aka core Democrat voters) and government workers at agencies that have exceeded their Constitutional bounds. Nancy’s delusions also include her being “comfortable” that the Democrats will regain the House in 2012. Life’s grand when you live in a dream instead of reality.

F) Here’s Senator McConnell’s speech on the Senate floor just before going to meet with President Obama on the subject of the deficit reduction talks. He laid it out clear and concise. Now let’s see if the GOP can stick to their guns and stand with the American people, or if they will allow themselves to be rolled by the biggest flim-flam artist in history.

G) The Obama Administration is (surprise, surprise) violating federal whistleblower laws by firing the ATF agent who publicized the “Operation Gunrunner” and “Operation Fast & Furious” scandals, despite warnings from Representative Issa. This Administration makes the Clinton Administration look positively honest and law-abiding!

H) Does the UN have any legitimacy anymore? Well, when IRAN of all places hosts the “International Conference on the Global Fight Against Terrorism”, turns it into a United States and Israel bash-fest, champions the conspiracy theory that 9-11 was an inside job to support Zionism, includes Sudanese President Omar al-Bashir, who is wanted by the International Criminal Court (ICC) for alleged war crimes in Darfur, and the whole thing is attended by Ban Ki-Moon and sponsored by the UN, you can make the case that the UN is now officially supporting Islamic terrorism and the restoration of the ideal of the worldwide Caliphate. It is beyond time for the US to kick that sorry bunch out of Noo Yawk, stop paying dues, and declare that no resolutions from that body will be recognized as legitimate.

I) Oh just wonderful. The Obama Administration’s people have recently met and negotiated with a man who planned the Beirut Marine Barracks bombing of 1983 and the bombing of a Jewish community center in Argentina in 1994 and is on Interpol’s most wanted list. Why are we negotiating with Iran regarding Afghanistan’s security? Why are we doing anything other than killing that terrorist?

J) Then again, we have a Republican Governor, who many have mentioned as a possible candidate for President or Vice President, who has spoken at a mosque with “extremist” (meaning that they believe and preach what the 2nd half of the Koran commands) views and befriended their imam, who admitted to being a member of Hamas. This Governor has now nominated a muslim, who has defended that imam and many muslims involved in the 9/11 case and aftermath both as an attorney and as a private citizen, to the Noo Joisey Superior Court. Chris Christie, your chances of being elected on a national stage have just gone down the toilet.

K) Somehow, methinks Dan Calabrese of North Star National doesn’t really enjoy the endless campaign season.

L) Is Al Gore the new Jim Bakker or Jimmy Swaggart? It looks like much of the world has caught on to his bovine excrement.

M) Whoulda thunkit? A study from the Phoenix Center shows how eliminating some of the over-regulations in our government could spur tremendous economic growth. “On average, eliminating the job of a single regulator grows the American economy by $6.2 million and nearly 100 private sector jobs annually.” Of course, that is NOT what the statists of the Democratic Socialist Fascist Party wants you to hear.

N) Schadenfreud at its best is now being seen in Than Franthithco, People’s Republic of Kookifornia. The state is replacing the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge, and they are saving over $400,000,000.00 by, get this, avoiding union construction costs and having the pieces of the bridge made in China and shipped over! There are serious concerns about the steel quality, as Chinese steel has a reputation of being inferior to American steel, but if they didn’t have to use union labor to build it, they could have saved the same amount and had American steel. Liberals screwing over their union buddies in the most left-wing city in America. Gotta love it!

O) Kookifornia gets another paragraph in my bi-weekly wrap-up, as a principal at a Sacramento-area high school delivered his graduation speech in English and Spanish. He said it was to make the Spanish-speaking relatives “feel comfortable.” He said, “To me we live in America and that’s the beauty of America: that we all bring our backgrounds our cultures our languages and that’s what makes us who we are.” Wrong answer, libtard. Read what Teddy Roosevelt had to say on the matter: “There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn’t an American at all. We have room but for one language here and that is the English language, for we intend to see that the crucible turns our people out as Americans, of American nationality; we have room for but one soul loyalty, and that is loyalty to the American people.” That also goes for the multitude that packed the Rose Bowl for the Gold Cup final and turned it into a home game for the Mexicans against the USA.

P) Didn’t I have a story kinda relating to this last week? Wait…they have a WHAT CHAMPIONSHIP?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Q) So how’s that model for Obamacare doing these days? It seems that patient groups are mad at Britain’s National Health Service because the NHS is denying proper care to cancer patients because the treatments are expensive. So, Representative Grayson, the Obamacare answer to cancer patients is “Die sooner”????

R) The “Chicago Way” hasn’t been looking too good recently. The corruption that the Second City is so famous for has actually been taken seriously by some courts and the court of public opinion. This week, a jury finally convicted former Governor Blagojevich on 17 of 20 counts, including all 11 counts of trying to sell the Senate seat vacated by Barack Obama when he became the occupant of 1600 Pennsylvania, and 3 counts each of shaking down a children’s hospital and a racetrack executive, while deadlocking on 1 of 2 counts of shaking down a construction executive (other count was the single acquittal) and 1 count of shaking down Rahm “I lived in Chicago even though I rented my house out while living in DC” Emanuel. Who does he think he is…Jesse Jackson?

S) I can imagine Bill Clinton saying that meeting with sex workers is “people-to-people diplomacy at its best”, but the statement actually came from Hillary! as she praised the international efforts of the State Department in furthering the cause of queers, dykes, tri-sexuals (they’ll try ANYTHING), and surgical freaks in places like Uganda, Malawi, Turkey, China, and the Soviet Uni…er, Russia. Why does OUR government have to support the “rights” of those perverts around the world? We shouldn’t even be supporting those people here! They made their choices to go outside of acceptable societal norms and against the words of the holy books of all major religions. They deserve whatever treatment they get.

T) Bill Clinton’s former mouthpiece (wait…maybe that isn’t the proper term for a non-Lewinsky) tried to slam Michelle Bachmann for her supposedly-incorrect statements regarding the Founding Fathers. Since Georgie Steffi is a liberal, his knowledge of the Founding Fathers is as faulty as the rest of the Democrats’ knowledge of the Fathers and the Constitution. Game, set, match to Bachmann and Levin.

U) Here’s a new one…a union that opposes Barack Obama and is warning America about Obama’s actions. The union happens to be the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents union, and they are very peeved at the Obama Administrations surrender to illegals.

V) This goes along with the two-pronged offensive by the Democrats to give amnesty to all illegals. First, the Senate Dims are going to push the DREAM Amnesty Act yet again. Secondly, the leader of ICE has published a memo with 19 points titled “Exercising Prosecutorial Discretion Consistent with the Civil Immigration Enforcement Priorities of the Agency for the Apprehension, Detention, and Removal of Aliens.” In other words, there are 19 reasons to let illegals go free instead of putting them before immigration judges who might follow the law and deport their arses.

W) So how much did the First Grifter’s tour of Afreaka with her mother, kids, and brother’s kids cost the American taxpayers? Well, the flights to and from cost $430,000 alone. An embassy spokesperson even said that the trip was a “personal pilgrimage” for the First Grifter, and since she has exactly ZERO official duties (according to that old thing written by a bunch of whiteys, some of whom owned slaves), that means every single penny of expenses should be paid from her big, fat (no, not her backside) bank account.

X) We now know what side is taking in the upcoming elections. They are running a story discussing how thin the resume is for Michelle Bachmann in her run for the White House. Her resume is quite thick compared to that of Barack “I voted ‘Present’ over 150 times because I can’t make simple decisions without a teleprompter” Obama in 2008.

Y) Some of y’all might remember the Reebok Terry Tate series of commercials. Well, Boost Mobile has apparently come up with something better. Check out the Boost Mobile BSDC. Since BS is part of the name, you can infer that there might be some bleeping going on.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“The American People will never knowingly adopt Socialism, but under the name of ‘Liberalism’ they will adopt every fragment of it.” - Norman Thomas in 1944, 6 time Socialist Party Presidential Candidate

The Constitution of the United States

Saturday, June 25, 2011

6-25-2011 The Weekend Claw

You know we've had a wild week when this is the 2nd column of the week and I don't even have room for stories like the State of Noo Yawk declaring itself to be subservient to the 1% of the population that chooses to be homosexual.

A) They just don’t get it. Senate Democrats are actually arguing for MORE spending while deficit reduction talks are ongoing. Turban Durbin actually mewled, “Get the recovery right before you get in this deficit-cutting mode. Get people back to work. Let's start moving in that direction.” What D-i-c-k doesn’t seem to understand is a) Only by cutting the deficit and bringing about economic stability will we ever create new jobs, and b) the American people know that government spending does NOTHING to create jobs and they want the deficit reduced. How’d the “stimulus” work out? He must have completely missed the big news of last November. Insanity can be defined as trying the same thing over and over expecting the result to change, and the Dim-ocrats have it in spades.

B) Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke followed up Turban’s idiocy by saying “I don’t think sharp immediate cuts in the deficit would bring more jobs.” This was said right around the time that he admitted to being completely clueless as to why the economy is all jacked up. Believers in Keynesian economic theory are always clueless when their actions cause economic downturns, as they do each and every time they put Keynesian theories into operation.

C) Tax Cheat Timmy was questioned about the Democrats’ plan to raise taxes on small business owners, and he responded that those tax hikes are necessary, otherwise “you have to shrink the overall size of government programs.” Well, DUH! Timmy, that is part of the objective! We MUST shrink the government down to its Constitutional limits!

D) The FBI is investigating this incident, which means the Affirmative Action Attorney General will probably prosecute the Border Patrol agents involved. The agents did exactly what they should have done and would be given medals if President Crawfish was in office. Anybody trying to cross our border illegally should be apprehended and sent back. If they can’t be caught or if they resist, deadly force should be used. If the so-called government of Mexico has a problem, they can deploy to keep their people on their own side of the border. FIX YOUR OWN COUNTRY!

E) Then again, we know such activities will be opposed by the Democrats, since Dear Leader just issued an Executive Order banning the deportation of just about any illegal that has been in the US for any length of time. Hmmm…issuing an order for a federal agency to violate federal laws…is that an impeachable offense?

F) Our priorities must be really screwed up when we have 28,500 members of our armed forces guarding the South Korean border, and less than 1,200 troops guarding the American southern border. The Korean border is a whopping 248 kilometers in length, compared to 3,169 kilometers for the US-Mexico border. About 212,000 invaders were captured last year in just the Tucson sector of our border. 212,000 is just the number that we CAUGHT! How many North Korean invaders crossed the Korean border last year? Not even 1,000. The defensive positions along the Korean DMZ need to be replicated along the entire length of our southern border.

G) Here is your basic liberal idiot. A Pulitzer Prize winning reporter for Washington Post and New York Times Magazine has publicly disclosed that he is an illegal, and showed off a treasure trove of falsified identification documents while claiming to be “undocumented”. He previously disclosed that he is a homosexual, meaning that he is a quadruple-protected minority (Filipino, homo, member of the left-wing extremist press, illegal), so the Obama Administration will back him 100% and probably not only give him amnesty, but grant him citizenship. Since he admitted it publicly, the proper action would be to have him already deported by the time my readers see this paragraph. The editor of the Than Franthithco Chronicle has even confirmed that this illegal is now being financially supported by the Tides Foundation, a far-left anti-American outfit under the control of George Soros. He also confirmed in his SF Chronicle blog article (linked in the Malkin column) that the training editor of the Washington Post knew he had hired an illegal and kept it secret. This means that the Tides Foundation and the WaPo have violated federal laws by harboring an illegal alien and knowingly employing one, and should be prosecuted.

H) Do you REALLY want to know the root causes of our housing crisis? Representative Issa authored this report, which gives you puh-lenty of background into the disaster we now face. I challenge any liberal to dispute a single thing Issa says.

I) Walter E. Williams is an absolute gem of an author and occasional conservative talk show guest host. Every time I hear him or read one of his columns, I have to wonder why I don’t feature him more often. His newest column, “America’s New Racists” is a definite must-read.

J) What happens when envirowackos get control of the Army Corps of Engineers and the council that controls the Missouri River? The priorities “go from flood control, facilitation of commercial traffic, and recreation to habitat restoration, wetlands preservation, and culturally sensitive and sustainable biodiversity.” A wildlife biologist on the council said that this year’s impending Biblical floods (no liberal will use that term, of course) this year will be a “prolonged headache for small towns and farmers along its path, but a boon for endangered species.” Yep, you got it. The envirowackos don’t care about what happens to millions of humans as long as they can help endangered species.

K) The left wingnuts who attacked Neal Boortz over his Atlanta comments are in heavy violation of their tax-exempt status, says a former White House Councel. Media Matters for America has engaged in a “war” with Fox News, intending to disrupt their business. They are also running media “boot camps” to promote Democratic Party policies. It is time for them to get sued!

L) Thanks to the double-jeopardy laws, OJ Simpson is free to admit that he killed Nicole and her friend Ron Goldman, and might be set to do so in an interview with Orca…er, Oprah. (How much is she paying for THAT interview???) His story is that he acted in self-defense, and is somewhat plausible, although once he disarmed her; the self-defense part is out the window. 95% of non-black America has known from Day One that he did it, but it will finally bring closure to one of the most-followed crime stories in American history. I guess he finally DID find the real killer after searching the golf courses of America.

M) So, are women actually losers in the recent Wal-Mart SCOTUS decision, or are the real losers the trial lawyers? Okay, since most of us believe that the trial lawyers are ALWAYS a bunch of losers, let me rephrase that. Did the women involved in the case lose anything in reality, or was it the trial lawyers who lost the most in this case?

N) Geert Wilders was acquitted on all hate-crime charges in the Netherlands. This is a major victory for freedom of speech in Europe and the ability of non-muslims to point out the truth about the death cult known as Islam. The muzzies are miffed, but when are they not?

O) The unindicted co-conspirators from the Holy Land Foundation support of terrorist groups trial, CAIR, has its panties in a wad (even more than usual). The IRS noticed that CAIR had not filed the proper paperwork for a few years and thus revoked their tax-exempt status. The Crawfish would prefer to see them lose all legal status within our nation and get named as a sponsor of terrorism, which they clearly are. Ya know, once upon a time I was told that my columns had shown up on one of CAIR’s “watch” lists. Wonder if they still consider me an evil, antagonizing infidel, or if I’m losing my touch.

P) Back in the bad ol’ days of the Soviet Union, when someone fell out of favor or had information that the State didn’t want to ever be revealed, that person was killed in a plane crash. This week, five Russian scientists who assisted in the development of Iran’s nuclear plant died in a plane crash. Coincidence?

Q) Neal Boortz is a genius. He managed to watch the same movie that I did recently, but he made a connection with one of the characters that is simply brilliant.

R) Tax Cheat Timmy was asked about the qualifications of Christine Lagarde to head up the International Monetary Fund, and said that she is “exceptionally talented.” Coming from Timmy, that means she is a completely clueless and incompetent socialist.

S) Oh. My. Gawd. I…uh…er…I have no idea how to comment on this story or what exactly to think about the people involved.

T) Billy Jeff Clinton just sold missile guidance technology to the Chinese. Under the rule of King Bu’raq al Obama, the Chinese are just buying up our country! Hat tip to co-worker Ed for this link.

U) Here’s your latest update from the Religion of Peace. Two muslim terrorists were plotting to attack the Seattle Military Entrance Processing Station, and the attached day care center. They were inspired by the Fort Hood shooter, and figured that three attackers with better weapons could kill a LOT more people and inspire other muslims to follow suit. Yes, this is a war of Islam vs. the rest of the world, and we had better admit it! Since these guys were going to commit an act of war, and they are not members of a recognized government’s military, they are illegal enemy combatants, and have no legal rights according to the Geneva Accords. They can be executed without any kind of trial if our military deems it appropriate.

V) George Soros and his socialist friends have quietly gone about getting their people elected as Secretary of State on eleven battleground states, so that THEY oversee the 2012 elections. They accuse the eeeevilll Republicans of “deciding who can vote and whose votes will count”, which means that the Republicans wouldn’t let people vote 5 times or vote at all if they were felons or illegal aliens, both key Democrat constituent groups. Prepare for massive voter fraud in 2012.

W) The left-wing treehuggers have their nits in a twit over the New Mexico and Arizona wildfires. It seems that some endangered species are being negatively affected by the fires. The Crawfish suggests that the EPA send in its crack team of lawyers with cease-and-desist orders against the flames immediately. If those idjuts would allow logging and grazing, not to mention brush clearing and occasional back burning, these fires would be smaller and much easier to contain and extinguish.

X) Chicago’s Police Superintendant is miffed about federal gun laws, presumably that 2nd Amendment thingy, that “facilitate the flow of illegal firearms into our urban centers, across this country, that are killing black and brown children.” Yes, he says our gun laws are RAAAAAAAAAACIST!!!! First of all, our laws do not facilitate anything but the confiscation of “illegal firearms”, since by your own admission those firearms are “illegal”. Secondly, do not blame the weapons. Blame the black and brown CRIMINALS who are killing the black and brown children. Oh my, is The Crawfish being RAAAAAACIST because he points out that well over 90% of black and brown murder victims are murdered by black or brown criminals? Oh, and notice that this moron was speaking at St. Sabina Catholic Church, the racist church formerly run by “Father” Pfleger, the buddy of Jeremiah Wrong and Bu’raq al-Obama.

Y) Okay, time for my John McEnroe moment. “You cannot be serious!” MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell actually let former Queen of the House Red Nanny P-Lousy get away with this statement: “The U.S. government cannot default on its debt, largely accrued by President George W. Bush.” That one surviving brain cell of her’s must be getting lonely. For Nanny’s information, Barack Obama has added more to the debt in 2.5 years than W did in 8, with those last two being the spend-crazy years of a Congress run by Harry Reid and some botox bimbo from Than Franthithco.

Z) A mall in Houston has had enough of the dumb-bass style of “sagging” and has banned pants hanging low enough to show the underwear. An “urban youth” is upset about it and says he won’t shop there anymore. Of course, his “shopping” at the mall probably involved just hanging around with his fellow “saggers” and maybe buying a soda in the food court. If these people knew that the style came from the homosexual prison culture to allow easy access, they probably would stop “sagging”. Then again, if they had fathers in their lives, they wouldn’t be “sagging” either! The malls in the Jacksonville, FL, area banned “sagging” years ago. Let’s face it, folks…these punks showing off their boxers is offensive and has no place in our society. Do we really wonder why the employment numbers for black youth are so low?

AA) Speaking of “urban youth”, here is a story from South Carolina that, according to Jesse Be The Jackson, the Not-So-Reverend Al, and all of the other race pimps, simply cannot happen. A mob of blacks might be accused of lynching a white boy. The young man is in critical condition after being severely beaten and robbed by a mob of 8 blacks, 7 of which are juveniles.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Do not ever let anyone claim to be a true American patriot, if they ever attempt to separate religion from politics.”-George Washington

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

6-22-2011 The Weekly Claw

Military folks know how often personnel in their first few months of service are wont to scream “my recruiter lied to me!” That’s how lost of Democrats feel about Obama these days. Like any good Division Commander (or Drill Instructor), all us conservatives can do is look at them, laugh, and welcome them to reality.

A)The acolytes of the Prophet Algoracle have been caught yet again doctoring the scientific data in order to further their agenda of Human Origin Global Warming And Similar Horrors (HOGWASH). Since the sea levels have not been rising fast enough, according to actual data, the University of Colorado’s Sea Level Research Group has decided to add 0.3 millimeters to the sea level every year on top of whatever readings they actually get, and this amount is cumulative. If you have to falsify your data in order to have the results go in the direction you want them to go in, then your theories are, by definition, FALSE! This is not the only area in which the “warmers” are feeding the world a bunch of bravo sierra, and it appears that only the blogging community is pointing out where the stench is originating.

B) Last week, we brought y’all the story of how Hillary! has a staffer whose who family is part of the Muslim Brotherhood. Since Hillary! detests Israel, we’re pretty sure who did THAT hiring. On the other hand, it does appear that Bill is still in charge of the interns. The appropriate quote at this point is from the song “Circumstances” by Rush: “Plus ca change, plus c’est la meme chose. The more the things CHANGE, the more they stay the same.”

C) Neal Boortz got called out by the same MSNBC show host who recently called Laura Ingraham a “right-wing slut.” Neal was making comments about Atlanta, and the need for good people to arm themselves in self-defense against the violent thugs that are ruining the city. On Monday, Neal went off in his Nealz Nuze on Ed Shultz, on Edward DuBose (the head of the Jaw-ja NAACP), and the others out there who scream “racism” every time it is pointed out that the urban black culture is completely self-destructive and violent. It is a column well worth reading.

D) Here we go with yet another story of taxpayer dollars being spent extremely unwisely. In one Pasadena, CA, neighborhood, the state bought most of the houses through eminent domain proceedings decades ago. This was done to facilitate the building of a new highway that has yet to be built. In the meantime, the state leases the houses out, and has to pay for all repairs since it is the landlord. Over 30 homes in this neighborhood have recently had their roofs replaced, at an average cost of over $71,000.00 per roof. To make matters even more comical, many of these houses are listed as historic landmarks, so studies have to be done to make sure that any repairs meet the historical qualifications, despite the fact that said houses will be bulldozed if the highway project ever happens. Folks, I cannot make up this lunacy.

E) Tavis Smiley of PBS is seen here interviewing RFK Jr. First of all, Smiley puts forth the premise that it is impossible to get factual news these days, presumably because of the eeevilll right wingers and Fox News. RFK Jr. replied that the only way for any news outlet to survive is to get corporate sponsorship, and that money goes only to the right wing media. He obviously has never heard of General Electric and their ownership of NBC, CNBC, and MSNBC. He continues by saying that lack of corporate sponsorship is the reason Air America failed. Air America, according to the Kennedy Alternate Universe, had much more listenership than right wing talk radio in every single market in the nation. This is just another example of a basic truism in America: If a Kennedy said it, it is probably a lie.

F) Speaking of lies, let’s take another look at the Obamacare bill. It just got more expensive, as someone noticed how middle-class retirees will qualify for free (actually paid for by our great-great grandchildren) health insurance and possibly even Medicaid. There go the Democrats again…buying votes with YOUR money.

G) I know this one won’t shock any of you. Tax Cheat Timmy says that it would be “irresponsible” for Congress to reduce the deficit through spending cuts alone. There must be a “balanced framework” that includes “revenue increases through tax reform.” In other words, the Administration is officially in favor of tax increases.

H) The Sierra Club is, for once, on the right side of an argument. They say that the municipalities in Los Angeles County are overcharging for both commercial and residential solar panel permits. The Crawfish asks: why does anybody need to pay a government entity in order to be allowed to install solar panels?

I)Thanks goes to my co-worker Cecil for sending this link to a 79 second video that most of you will enjoy. That man could sure deliver a good joke!

K) Is a blow-up doll considered to be more deadly serious than a gun? It is if you are a high school student in Indiana. A senior brought a blow-up doll to school and put it in the ladies’ locker room as a prank. He now faces up to 8 years in prison on terrorism charges. If he had brought a real weapon to school, the maximum penalty would have been THREE years. Go figger.

L) Are you ready for more intrusive government? King County, WA, is home to one of the most liberal cities in the nation, Seattle, so it figures that this kind of junk would occur there. Take a look at the nanny-state County Ordinance that was just passed by the County Council. Yes, the local and county cops really need to be out ticketing swimmers and tubers instead of preventing actual crimes.

M) Noo Yawk atheists are once again proving their ignorance. They are objecting to a new street name near a firehouse that lost seven firefighters on 9/11, “Seven In Heaven Way”. The atheists are saying that this is a violation of the Constitutional separation of church and state. Really? Did Congress pass a law establishing a religion? Nope. A city renamed a street. If you are going to complain like that, know what the Constitution actually says, dumb-basses.

N) Looks like there’s some dissention in the ranks of the Obama Administration. His nominee to the position of Commerce Secretary opposes the NLRB actions against Boeing. You see, John Bryson happens to be on the Board of Directors at Boeing. Wait a sec…I didn’t think Barack Obama approved of having people with private sector experience in his Administration.

O) I just wish that I had thought of this idea first. Somebody’s gonna make a mint as long as Obama is in office.

P) As His Majesty continues to tell Congress that the War Powers Resolution does not apply to him, we have to take notice of how liberals change the meaning of words in order to make their actions seem innocent. Once upon a time, GAY meant “happy”. Someone who was a “centrist” supported the Constitution. "Kinetic" meant of or pertaining to movement. I still don’t know how they changed that definition to mean “war”.

Q) Schadenfreude strikes again for the union morons who blindly supported Barack Obama as their savior. Tens of thousands of union electrical workers and tens of thousands of union miners face the destruction of their jobs at the hands of the Obama Administration’s war against America. That’s what you get for putting your faith in a union and believing what the union bosses, who get all of their wealth by taking money out of the workers’ paychecks, tell you to believe.

R) The General Electric Barack Obama Network, formerly known as NBC, spit in the face of all Americans of faith at the beginning of their Sunday coverage of the US Open Golf Championship. Their opening twice had school kids reciting the Pledge of Allegiance. Both times, NBC cut out “One Nation, under God, indivisible”. We can’t go offending the muslims and atheists, can we? Of course not, since they are almost all Democrat voters. But they will gladly piss on the vast majority that believes in God. The People noticed, and with video clips going viral and Twitter burning up the broadband, NBC was forced to make an on air apology while the final round was still underway.

S) Here’s a story about a Royal Marine who was killed in Afghanistan, and what he wanted some of his insurance money to pay for. To Royal Marine David Hart…Hand salute…Ready…to! Carry on.

T) “Federalism secures the freedom of the individual. It allows States to respond, through the enactment of positive law, to the initiative of those who seek a voice in shaping the destiny of their own times without having to rely solely upon the political processes that control a remote central power.” That is a passage from a ruling by the Supreme Court this past week that said individuals have standing before federal courts when challenging a federal statute on grounds that it exceeds the federal government’s Constitutional authority, especially regarding the 9th and 10th Amendments. In what must come as a shock to liberals everywhere, the decision was unanimous, with Kennedy delivering the majority opinion and Ginsburg writing a concurring opinion. Now maybe we can get the ball rolling on overturning about half of the federal laws, programs, departments, and regulations on the books. Okay, lots more than half, but half would be a good start!

U) Regular Claw reader Gray Ghost sent in this article about a female scientist in Russia and her bizarre experiments with beluga whales…in water below 32 degrees. This chick is NUTS!

V) micHELLe is off on another taxpayer-funded vacation, and she’s taking her junior grifters along with. This time she is going to Afreaka on “official First Lady business”, which is how they justify getting the government to pay for it. Too bad that the First Lady has no “official business” according to the Constitution. It’s good to be the Queen.

W) Why in the world does anybody believe what Barack Obama says on the campaign trail? He actually told the folks at a fundraiser, hosted by Americans in Support of a Strong U.S.-Israel Relationship that his Administration has done more for Israel’s security than any in the past 25 years. Now he IS really telling the truth, but you just have to be careful about how you read those words. He didn’t say that he has done POSITIVE things for Israel’s security. He has done more to UNDERMINE Israel’s security than any other President since Israel’s birth.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Do not ever let anyone claim to be a true American patriot, if they ever attempt to separate religion from politics.”-George Washington

The Constitution of the United States

Saturday, June 18, 2011

6-18-2011 The Weekend Claw

Here we go with another Special Edition of The Claw. By Friday night, I already had enough material for a full column, so here it is.

A)Since I’m working nights, and the transcripts were not made available for a few days, the best input I was able to get on the GOP debate last week came from this source. He probably makes more sense than the idjuts on CNN could ever hope to achieve.

B) Color The Crawfish not surprised in the least at this story. Travel and Leisure Magazine ranked Filthadelphia as the 2nd dirtiest city in America, trailing only N’awlins. I was stationed in that area twice, and can truly say that it is highly depressing to be almost anywhere within the city limits. It is rowhouse slum after rowhouse slum. Center City, where the tourist and historical sites are, is the cleanest part, but still doesn’t measure up to what it should be, and the people make Noo Yawkers look positively polite. Whaddya expect from a city that is 100% run by liberals, unions, and minorities to the point that they had a former street thug as mayor for two terms?

C) Speaking of a city government that is suffering from liberal lunacy and control freak mania, check out what is going on in Coral Gables, Florida. Even if my garage was completely cleaned out, there’s no way that Mrs. Crawfish’s pick’em up truck would fit in there.

D) I find it rather funny that the socialist left keeps comparing the conservative right to National Socialist Germany. In this case, we have a union thug leader, who gets his money by extorting it from real workers, comparing Noo Joisey Guvna Chris Christie to Adolf Hitler because he is trying to bring fiscal responsibility to the state government. Hey Shelton, as VP of the Communication Workers of America district 1, when was the last time you worked 40 hours in a week as a communications worker instead of a union thug? If that was more than 6 months ago, you are NOT a communications worker, and therefore should NOT be a part of that union.

E) My, how multi-culturalism causes problems. In Britain, the cops look the other way when muslims commit crimes so they aren’t called bigots. When the muslims attack the homosexuals, the police are in a quandary. Do they risk being called bigots by pursuing the “hate crimes”, or do they leave a protected minority unprotected? Why don’t they, as a nation, grow a pair and tell the mooks to assimilate into British culture or go back to their camels and sand fleas? This is exactly what we need to do in the US when it comes to our latino immigrants and our immigrants who are Followers of the Pedophilic False Prophet.

F) I’ve always thought that the Japanese ate some weird crap, but I never thought they’d be literally eating weird crap. Remind me to just order chicken if I ever go over there.

G) If I could have been in this hearing room I would have given Texas State Senator Chris Harris a standing ovation. A man who immigrated to the US 23 years ago was testifying against SB9, which would eliminate “sanctuary cities”, but his testimony was in spanish (not capitalized on purpose, as its use is an insult to our nation), with a translator. State Senator Harris jumped him for not being able to speak his mind in English after being here that long. Immigrants must assimilate to our culture, not the other way around. On top of that, the mezzican’s testimony was that SB9 was anti-family. Really? If the family is here legally, there is no problem. If they are not here legally, they need to be deported, and that’s their own damned fault! Of course, the editorial board of horribly misnamed Austin American-Statesman attacked Harris for his “intolerance”, but what do you expect from the newspaper of a city whose motto is “Keep Austin Weird” and has dreams of becoming the new Than Franthithco. Then again, Than Franthithco just keeps getting nuttier and nuttier, so Austin can’t catch up.

H) Meanwhile, news networks broadcasting in spanish are expanding with the 2012 election on the horizon. President Crawfish would put an end to this stuff. My FCC would not give a license to any network broadcasting in a foreign language over 50 miles from a border of a nation with a population that speaks that language. The only exceptions would be to allow such networks to be seen in tourist hotels and foreign consulates/embassies. The UN doesn’t count. Come to America and become part of America. If you don’t like it, go back to the nation you truly support.

I) do foreign countries believe that they have any right to have a say in our laws? Mexico and 10 other countries have filed briefs in federal court to prevent Georgia law enforcement personnel from checking immigration status on arrestees who have no ID, and turning them over to ICE if they are illegals. If the judge had a pair, he’d tell those nations that they have no standing in the matter and for them to put those amicus briefs somewhere dark and stinky.

J) Besides his lame reasoning of why he is not technically violating the War Powers Act (it’s not really combat, and it is made legit by support from the UN, which overrides Congress) even though he clearly is, there is yet another violation of federal law that could, and should, get Barack Obama impeached and removed from office. For the past three years, he has failed to do what the 2003 Medicare Modernization Act REQUIRES the President to do. Instead of simply putting forth a plan, all the Democrats can do is scream that the GOP wants to push Granny off the cliff.

K) Last week, I mentioned how Dallas Mavericks fans celebrated their team’s championship the right way, with happiness, cheering, and civility. The Crawfish must also tip his hat to the fans of the Boston Bruins, who also celebrated a championship the right way. Let us contrast that with how the people of Vancouver reacted when their Canucks lost Game 7 to the Bruins.

L) Why would a dictator ever heed the advice of legal experts? That’s what we must ask in regards to the War Powers Act, since King Barry was advised that continuing hostilities in Libya really is continuing hostilities, but he said “No, firing missiles at the forces of another sovereign nation is NOT hostilities, and besides…the UN said I could and they mean more to me than Congress!”

M) The morons at Westboro “Baptist” “Church” are at it again. This time they say the Arizona wildfires are God’s punishment to the state. What did the state do to deserve this? Governor Brewer tried to criminalize the military funeral protests of the Westboro jackasses.

N) Lucia de Vernai of North Star National takes a look at the recovery of Gabby Giffords, and the Democrats putting desperation to use her for partisan political gain ahead of her well-being.

O) Just when you thought you had heard all of the best in liberal stooooopidity, along comes the leftwing nuthouse called Portland, OR. They drained an entire reservoir because cameras caught one guy peeing in the lake. Do they not know about all of the fish poop in there already?

P) Some interesting news came out of the investigations surrounding Weinergate, and you probably won’t find it in the mainstream media. Hillary Clinton’s staff includes someone whose whole family is part of the Muslim Brotherhood. I know…y’all ain’t surprised by that in the least.

Q) Tingly Leg Matthews said that the Weiner resignation “reminded me of the Saddam Hussein hanging.” Probably because both were such sad events for Matthews.

R) The supposedly-failed North Korean nuke tests might not have been true failures. They may have actually been working on a “super-EMP” warhead. The Soviets worked on one of these long ago, and they calculated huge and long-lasting disruptions in America’s economy and day-to-day life. That was in the days before we had microchips running damned near EVERYTHING in our country. In April 2008, a report was released by the Commission to Assess the Threat to the United States from Electromagnetic Pulse (EMP) Attack. Their conclusions show that this type of attack, if performed correctly, would really screw up our country for years.

S) The Crawfish thinks these gentlemen missed the mark. Should this be made for men to wear, or for women to wear? Men are the ones who tend to be turned on by that scent! (Note: there is an advertisement on this video link before the story).

T) Movie review time! The Crawfish family just went to see Ryan Reynolds as “The Green Lantern”. If you are expecting super effects, an intricate plot, and strong character development (like the Batman Dark Knight series)…this ain’t your flick. This is more old-school superhero stuff. The effects are good, just not over-the-top. It is entertaining, kid-friendly, and just slightly campy. The 3D option is probably a bit better.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Do not ever let anyone claim to be a true American patriot, if they ever attempt to separate religion from politics.”-George Washington

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

6-15-2011 The Weekly Claw

Okay, so you are all wondering what happened to the 6-8-2011 edition of The Weekly Claw. Well, The Crawfish screwed up in the home swamp and Mrs. Crawfish “challenged” me to not touch the home computer for 5 days. When I returned to the ‘puter, I had to spend a day dealing with tech support because of a Windows activation problem, followed by over 80 Windows updates. I even had to leave for work while dealing with HP support and Mrs. Crawfish finished the fixes. Now believe it or not, I DID throw out about 15 other paragraphs from my draft, and yet still ended up with this monstrosity. Must have been a wild two weeks!

A)I know a lot of you don’t give a damn about sports, but indulge me for just a moment as I revel in the first NBA championship for my hometown Dallas Mavericks. If just about any other major city (Miami, Detroit, El Lay, Filthadelphia…) had won the title, there would have been hundreds of arrests, downtown store windows shattered, looting, cars (some of them belonging to the local gendarmes) set afire, and such, but the people of Dallas celebrated the right way. There were only 14 arrests reported by the Dallas Police Department on Sunday night (6 public intoxication, 4 disorderly conduct, and 4 outstanding warrants), which is fewer than on a regular Friday night. Congrats to Dirk, JKidd, JET, Shawn, Tyson, JJ, DeShawn, The Custodian, Peja, Ian, Brendan, Corey, Roddy B, Caron, Coach Rick, and the rest of Mark Cuban’s guys…and a BIG RASPBERRY TO LEBRON!!!!!!!!!

B) Here is some truly sad news for aviation enthusiasts like The Crawfish. Another irreplaceable treasure gone forever. At least everyone got out safely.

C) Since the Eurofighter Typhoon is the main competition to the F-35 in the international sales market right now, this story could be very good news to Lockheed Martin Aeronautics, and thousands of workers in The Crawfish’s hometown of Fort Worth, TX.

D) Barack Obama just spat in the face of the Brits yet again, just a week after visiting London and praising our “special relationship” with the UK. Now he is siding with Argentina, Nicaragua, and Venezuela in signing on to a document at the Organization of American States meeting that demands Britain enter negotiations with Argentina over the future of the Falkland Islands. The draft resolution even calls the islands the “Malvinas”, which is the Argentinean name, instead of “Falklands”, indicating which nation the signatory nations believe to have proper right of ownership of the islands.

E) An Ohio prosecutor had to drop a murder case against an illegal alien because he wasn’t given proper Miranda rights by the interpreter before interrogation. The simple fix to this is to only give Miranda rights in English unless the person being interrogated is a foreigner who is in this country legally. Illegals and those who refuse to assimilate into OUR culture had best keep to the straight and narrow.

F) Of course, we have a hard time stopping the illegals from entering our nation when Democrats are in charge. Not only do they resist actual border enforcement, but they also put envirowacko regulations in place to prevent the Border Patrol from doing the job when the Administration gives them the go-ahead. Thankfully, there are some in Congress who are working to end that bovine excrement.

G) Only about 4000 people attended this year’s May Day event in El Lay, which was co-sponsored by Obama’s favorite thugs in the SEIU. Besides the SEIU, the other major groups represented were the Communist Party, teachers unions, La Raza, the Brown Berets, and the self-described Queers. La Raza and the Brown Berets were among the groups supporting not only amnesty, but the return of the southwestern states to Mexico. All of these groups had two things in common; they are anti-USA and they are pro-Obama.

H) Why is it that Hispanics in America seem to be passionate and vocal about only one issue, that being support of illegal immigration? You would think that the ones who did the right thing and went through the whole process to come here legally would side with conservatives, who support LEGAL immigration and deportation of ILLEGALS. Meanwhile, as Barack and his Homeland Security Ditz claim the border is secure, we get stories like this one, which prove otherwise.

I)I feel sorry for the woman involved, since she is probably doubly traumatized, but this guy got what he deserved.

J) Take a look at the “reformer” who got an exclusive White House invite. Looks like he fits in perfectly with the King and First Grifter family.

K) How much more out of step with America can this Administration get? Well, I’m glad you asked. The Department of Education, which does suuuuuuuch a wonderful job, held a “Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Youth Summit”. First of all, I don’t know any youth who are transgender, since that requires a series of surgeries and is not usually available to non-adults. Secondly, why is this Administration pandering to a group that, until pop culture and the Democratic Party made it coooooool to be part of, made up less than 1% of the American population? The man who runs the Administration for Children and Families (where does the Constitution say we need THAT???) said to the attendees, “of course, we’re also trying to recruit more foster and adoptive parents who are lesbian and gay,” showing the liberal disdain of the REAL American family. These people really do make me want to puke.

L) Europe is crumbling under the failure of its socialist governments and is being overrun by muslims, but this is what the EU is really concerned with. Seriously?

M) Is it a requirement to be an absolute moron to hold a governmental position in California? I’m guessing that it is at least a check in the block for major promotions, since the Police Chief in El Lay is dumb enough to say “we should not demonize the Muslim Brotherhood.” We shouldn’t demonize a group that has literally declared war on us and our way of life? We shouldn’t demonize a group that adheres to the Koran’s commands that non-muslims must be converted, enslaved, or put to the sword, and that the whole world must be put under strict Sharia Law? That’s kinda like saying in 1942 that we shouldn’t demonize Hitler and Tojo.

N) Remember how Barack Obama promised that energy prices would “necessarily skyrocket” if he was able to implement his plans. One of the largest power companies in America announced that they will be forced to shut down six power plants over the next three years because of Obama’s new EPA regulations. Couple that with the way he has caused oil prices to go up and…he has lived up to his promise.

O) Well, the big story in the media has been Weiner-boy, who after his lies and final admission of guilt still will not resign. That is because he is a Democrat. Democrats do not lose their elected jobs over sex scandals. We all know about Bill Clinton’s multiple scandals. There was Gary Studds, who took an underage male page on a foreign trip to have “relations”. Bawney Fwank, another homo from Taxachusetts, ran a gay brothel with his male prostitute boyfriend, and just got a censure. Jim Bates of California just got a Letter of Reproval following his sex scandal. Compare this to Republicans Mark Souder of Indiana, Florida’s Mark Foley, Oregon’s Bob Packwood who acted just like Bill Clinton in the same time period, and just recently Noo Yawk’s Chris Lee who acted very similar to Weiner-boy.

P) The folks Red Nanny P-Lousy wants to put in charge of the Weinergate ethics investigation are some of the same ones in charge of the Maxine Waters ethics investigation and trial. How’s that trial going? It was supposed to get underway last fall, but the Democrats are obstructing it to no end, trying to sweep the whole thing under the rug. I don’t think there’s a big enough rug in the world to sweep Weiner under.

Q) In discussing Weiner-boy, MSNBC’s Chris “Tingly Leg” Matthews said that he believes Noo Yawk is culturally superior to the rest of the nation and Christians are culturally “backward”. Once again, liberals show their hatred of morality and support of degenerate behavior.

R) The Obama-Holder Injustice Department has forced the city of Dayton, Ohio, to LOWER its exam requirements for black fire department and police department candidates because so many of them were failing the exam. The racists at DOJ even threatened the city with a lawsuit if they did not comply, saying the city was violating the Civil Rights Act of 1964 because the test “has a statistically significant disparate impact upon African-American candidates.” (Where does that act mandate giving jobs to people who are too stoooopid to qualify for them?) The Affirmative Action AG’s peeps took these actions despite the 2009 Supreme Court ruling in the New Haven, Connecticut case that said a city could not disregard testing results just because blacks weren’t smart enough to pass the tests. The DOJ senior attorney even went so far as to say that written tests shouldn’t be needed, since firefighters don’t need to know how to read and write. Of course, these black candidates would probably have scored much higher if they had not been products of public schools with union teachers.

S) Her Majesty Queen micHELLe is once again sucking up taxpayer dollars for personal gain. She headed out to Californication on OUR dime to headline four DNC fundraisers, mixing in a small bit of “official First Lady business”. The “official” business included being a guest star on a Disney TV show and hobnobbing with Hollyweird types in a “Joining Forces” event supposedly to support military families. Since she and her husband hate the military even more than the Clintons did, this is quite laughable. If she wants to support military families, she should convince her husband and every other Democrat politician in our nation to resign and get REAL jobs. At one of the fundraisers, which charged $1000 per person for the invited crowd of 500, the First Grifter charged $10,000 per person for photographs with her. Who in their sane mind would pay that much to take a photograph with one of the (inside and outside) ugliest women in America? She told that same crowd, in referring to her husband, “that man doesn’t take a day off!” Uh, micHELLe? Hasn’t he gone golfing for the past 11 straight weekends?

T) Calling the Prophet Algoracle. A British study has determined that electric cars aren’t really green at all. There is no CO2 savings until they are driven 77,400 miles, and this does not even take into account that the electricity used to recharge the vehicles in many areas of the United States would come from coal-fired power plants!

U) We have more news sure to make Algoracle crawl back into his hole…er, one of his energy-inefficient mansions. It looks like our period of heavy sunspot activity, which has caused warmer temperatures, might be dying off into a much less active period. Some scientists are even predicting a second happening of the “Maunder Minimum”, which was a 70-year long period of decreased sunspot activity from 1645-1715. Those years happened to be rather cool on our earth.

V) Meanwhile, the envirowackos at the Interior Department are hell-bent on destroying as many American jobs as they possibly can.

W) The Obama Administration, in concert with the Useless Nations, is attempting to overturn our Constitution. According to the Constitution, any treaty ratified by the Senate becomes Constitutional law. The UN is trying to put forth a “Small Arms Treaty” that would severely restrict private gun ownership in signatory nations. In essense, the 2nd Amendment would be null-and-void. It has the support of almost every single member of the Obama Administration.

X) This article is for those of you who still insist that Islam is a religion of peace, and that only “radical” muslims are in favor of Jihad. In other words, this is for those liberals who have never read the unholy Koran.

Y) Here we go yet again. Another federal judge seems to think that a local school district is Congress, and the act of praying at a graduation ceremony is the same thing as making a law. He was even threatening jail time for students who uphold their schools and town’s traditions. This judge was appointed to the federal bench by a man who lied under oath and couldn’t figure out the meaning of the word “is”, and back in 1978 was named the Outstanding Young Democrat of Bexar County, so we know that he doesn’t understand the actual words of the Constitution, so I’ll print ‘em here for his perusal: “CONGRESS SHALL MAKE NO LAW RESPECTING AN ESTABLISHMENT OF RELIGION, NOR PROHIBITING THE FREE EXERCISE THEREOF” and “THE POWERS NOT DELEGATED TO THE UNITED STATES BY THE CONSTITUTION, NOR PROHIBITED BY IT TO THE STATES, ARE RESERVED TO THE STATES RESPECTIVELY, OR TO THE PEOPLE.” It is so simple that even a liberal SHOULD be able to understand, even if he is a judge or an Expat. As for the claim by the family and declaration by the judge that a boy would “suffer irreparable harm” if anyone prayed at the ceremony, if THAT causes him such harm, then the real world is obviously too much for him to handle. He needs to go ahead and kill himself now.

Z) In the first GOP debate this week, the question of separation of church and state came up. The best answer came from Tim Pawlenty, although I do believe the author of the linked article had an even better answer at the end of his first paragraph!

AA)Don’t tell me that the Democrats in general and the Obama Administration in particular have been LYING to us! Really? The Freddie and Fannie boondoggle just got worse. While the left is saying that the bailout of Bawney Fwank’s favorite entities will end up costing $130,000,000,000.00+, they must be using the same cooked books that Franklin Raines, Jamie Gorelick, and the rest of the Democrats who made millions running these scams were using to bamboozle Congress for so long. The actual cost is going to be over $317,000,000,000.00. That’s not just a wittle bitty accounting error. That is more lying and fraud from the most transparent administration in history. For the amount of money that the taxpayers have spent on those entities, we could have purchased most of those mortgages outright.

BB) The model for Obamacare, Britain’s National Health Service, is facing a “financial crisis.” Knowing the Brit penchant for understatement, the American term for this would be “financial disaster”, or in Democrat-speak “Republicans wanting you to die sooner.” Costs are going through the roof even as quality of care plummets, since there is no competition and the gummint is picking up the tab. Does this surprise any of y’all? This is what the Democrats want for you!

CC) The past few years have shown an uptick in black-on-non-black violence, much of it coordinated and premeditated. The media is quick to ignore such facts, but if the races were reversed, they’d be all over it like rats on Cheetoes.

DD) A co-worker of mine says that he can understand the activity if the grave being visited was that of the woman’s ex-husband, but otherwise it is just R-A-W-N-G, a bit freaky, and funny.

EE) I knew there was something evil in them when I saw them for the first time, so I refused to ever watch ‘em again. Yes, my friends, the Smurfs are racist, sexist, Nazis.

FF) Those wonderful and tolerant Followers of the Pedophilic False Prophet are at it again in Pakistan. Now they are asking the nation’s Supreme Court to ban the Bible from their country. That’s just a step on the road to forcing dhimmitude upon the Christians, or just killing them outright.

GG) The Congressional leadership on both sides of the aisle wants to keep sending copious amounts of aid to Pakistan, in return for what? Nothing! If they can’t make it on their own, they simply need to fail. They are not real allies, and they never will be. Representative West understands this. Foreign aid should only go to those nations that are our friends. The only aid that should go to nations that are other-than-true-friends should be humanitarian aid when disasters strike.

HH) Once more, this time with feeling! There was no such thing as the “Palestinian people” until the days of terrorist leader Yassir Arafat.

II)Obama’s Perfumed Prince, Admiral Mike Mullen, says that the military might start reducing pay and benefits for our military personnel and veterans. How typical of that liberal career bureaucrat and suck-up. Instead of screwing over the people who have honorably served our nation, how about taking pay and benefits away from people who don’t want to work? End all welfare, public housing, food stamps, and such to all who are not physically and/or mentally disabled to the point that they cannot work! Do they really want to piss off the veterans of our nation?

JJ) Admiral James Winnefeld has been nominated to the post of Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. He is not a household name, but is described as “Mullen’s guy”, meaning he is from the Admiral Mullen school of thought. That means he is a political operator, a "Perfumed Prince", not a warfighter or a true leader. That’s probably why Obama nominated him.

KK) Folks, I really can’t make this stuff up. Line-reader Sigourney Weaver says that Glo-Bull Warming is sexist and one of the solutions is to “empower women.” See what happens when you let a ditz speak off-script? And to think that the libs believe Sarah Palin to be stooopid….

LL) Now THIS is what I call customer loyalty.

MM) The Crawfish gives a salute and a traditional Navy “Well Done!” to Army Staff Sergeant Eddie Peoples. Remember, folks, when seconds count the police are only minutes away.

NN) The Crawfish also gives a final salute to Purple Heart awardee, and veteran of Operation Shingle, James Arness. The brother of actor Peter Graves, Arness spent twenty years portraying US Marshall Matt Dillon on the show “Gunsmoke”. He passed away last week at age 88. Thank you for your service to your nation and for entertaining us for all those years.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Thanking Obama for killing Bin Laden is like going into McDonalds and thanking Ronald McDonald for the hamburger. It's the guy cooking the burger that should get the credit, not the clown.” Quote courtesy of Gray Ghost

The Constitution of the United States

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

6-1-2011 The Weekly Claw

Sometimes, you read the news and wonder how those people manage to get out of bed by themselves.

A) Debbie the Ditz, the new head of the DNC, has repeatedly criticized Republicans who opposed the bailouts of GM and Chrysler, and those who don’t drive American/union-made cars. Well, guess who drives a Nissan!

B) When a TRUE LEADER screws up, he does the honorable thing and steps down. Read what Commander Koss said, and compare his words and actions with those of Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Barack Obama.

C) By now, the media has drummed it into the heads of most Americans that the Paul Ryan budget plan was voted down in the Senate 40-57. What 99% of the media is ignoring is that the OBAMA budget plan was voted down as well, 97-0!!!!!!

D) Once again there are people who seem to forget that the “establishment clause” and the doctrine of “separation of church and state” is only valid on the federal level if Congress attempts to make a federal law establishing a state religion. A local school district may do as it pleases regarding religion, according to the actual WORDS in the Constitution.

E) The Prophet of the Church of Glo-Bull Warming, His Eminence the Algoracle, is the final word on all things environmental. Too bad his grades in natural science courses in college were not that good.

F) Florida’s Governor signed a bill that would require society’s leeches to pass drug tests to get their freebies. Five members of the state’s Democratic Congressional delegation immediately called the new law “unConstitutional”, even though it is the freebies themselves that are unConstitutional. One said it is an illegal invasion of privacy. If they don’t want to take drug tests, they can forego the drug testing!

G) Paul Ryan takes lying Harry Reid to task on Ryan’s budget plan and how it will NOT screw over our senior citizens.

H) Martin Bashir of MSNBC tells his 75 viewers that Sarah Palin’s bus tour might be in violation of federal laws. Specifically, he believes that the American flags decorating the outside of the bus are being used for advertising, which is a violation of the flag code. The Obama Administration and the Donkeys in Congress trash the Constitution every day, but MSNBC is worried about a possible violation of the Flag Code? This is what passes for “journalism” in the Obamedia.

I) MSNBC is also aghast with a story that some 8th graders from Pennsylvania were on a field trip, and some of them had lunch at (GASP!) Hooters Restaurant. So? The Crawfish’s daughters love to eat at Hooters. The food is pretty good, and the youngest can watch 5 sporting events at the same time! The waitresses are not nekkid, and are actually wearing less revealing outfits than can be seen at the local water park or Renaissance faire.

J) Ann-Marie (***sigh***) Murrell gives us a brief history of the American Civil Communis….., er Liberties Union. Kinda explains why they have opposed real Americans and the actual words of the Constitution for as long as I can remember.

K) Haven’t we heard this one enough by now? Rep. Clyburn, (Donkey-South Cackalacka) says that all of Obama’s problems are because of….wait for it….wait for it….all together now…RACISM!!!

L) Slobbering Bawney Fwank’s involvement in the Fannie Mae scandal just got worse. Not only did he help politically-connected liberals drive it into the ground, while cooking the books and getting millions for themselves, but now he admits that he got his homo lover a job at Fannie Mae while he was on the House committee that oversees the institution.

M) How do you know your city council is a bunch of control freaks? Yes, the Dems outnumber the GOP on the council by 9-3. It could be worse, as the wackos in La Jolla are demanding that the city get an environmental impact survey (costing thousands of dollars and taking years to complete) before having any fireworks displays.

N) The Bangladeshi police chief in the article says that the cops will arrest the perp “once his condition gets better.” Uh…I don’t think it is going to get better.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Thanking Obama for killing Bin Laden is like going into McDonalds and thanking Ronald McDonald for the hamburger. It's the guy cooking the burger that should get the credit, not the clown.” Quote courtesy of Gray Ghost

The Constitution of the United States