Wednesday, June 1, 2011

6-1-2011 The Weekly Claw

Sometimes, you read the news and wonder how those people manage to get out of bed by themselves.

A) Debbie the Ditz, the new head of the DNC, has repeatedly criticized Republicans who opposed the bailouts of GM and Chrysler, and those who don’t drive American/union-made cars. Well, guess who drives a Nissan!

B) When a TRUE LEADER screws up, he does the honorable thing and steps down. Read what Commander Koss said, and compare his words and actions with those of Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, and Barack Obama.

C) By now, the media has drummed it into the heads of most Americans that the Paul Ryan budget plan was voted down in the Senate 40-57. What 99% of the media is ignoring is that the OBAMA budget plan was voted down as well, 97-0!!!!!!

D) Once again there are people who seem to forget that the “establishment clause” and the doctrine of “separation of church and state” is only valid on the federal level if Congress attempts to make a federal law establishing a state religion. A local school district may do as it pleases regarding religion, according to the actual WORDS in the Constitution.

E) The Prophet of the Church of Glo-Bull Warming, His Eminence the Algoracle, is the final word on all things environmental. Too bad his grades in natural science courses in college were not that good.

F) Florida’s Governor signed a bill that would require society’s leeches to pass drug tests to get their freebies. Five members of the state’s Democratic Congressional delegation immediately called the new law “unConstitutional”, even though it is the freebies themselves that are unConstitutional. One said it is an illegal invasion of privacy. If they don’t want to take drug tests, they can forego the drug testing!

G) Paul Ryan takes lying Harry Reid to task on Ryan’s budget plan and how it will NOT screw over our senior citizens.

H) Martin Bashir of MSNBC tells his 75 viewers that Sarah Palin’s bus tour might be in violation of federal laws. Specifically, he believes that the American flags decorating the outside of the bus are being used for advertising, which is a violation of the flag code. The Obama Administration and the Donkeys in Congress trash the Constitution every day, but MSNBC is worried about a possible violation of the Flag Code? This is what passes for “journalism” in the Obamedia.

I) MSNBC is also aghast with a story that some 8th graders from Pennsylvania were on a field trip, and some of them had lunch at (GASP!) Hooters Restaurant. So? The Crawfish’s daughters love to eat at Hooters. The food is pretty good, and the youngest can watch 5 sporting events at the same time! The waitresses are not nekkid, and are actually wearing less revealing outfits than can be seen at the local water park or Renaissance faire.

J) Ann-Marie (***sigh***) Murrell gives us a brief history of the American Civil Communis….., er Liberties Union. Kinda explains why they have opposed real Americans and the actual words of the Constitution for as long as I can remember.

K) Haven’t we heard this one enough by now? Rep. Clyburn, (Donkey-South Cackalacka) says that all of Obama’s problems are because of….wait for it….wait for it….all together now…RACISM!!!

L) Slobbering Bawney Fwank’s involvement in the Fannie Mae scandal just got worse. Not only did he help politically-connected liberals drive it into the ground, while cooking the books and getting millions for themselves, but now he admits that he got his homo lover a job at Fannie Mae while he was on the House committee that oversees the institution.

M) How do you know your city council is a bunch of control freaks? Yes, the Dems outnumber the GOP on the council by 9-3. It could be worse, as the wackos in La Jolla are demanding that the city get an environmental impact survey (costing thousands of dollars and taking years to complete) before having any fireworks displays.

N) The Bangladeshi police chief in the article says that the cops will arrest the perp “once his condition gets better.” Uh…I don’t think it is going to get better.

If y’all come across any weird/stoooopid/strange news stories that might be fodder for The Weekly Claw or The Weekend Claw, e-mail them to me at and I’ll consider ‘em. Yes, I will give you newshounds credit.

“Thanking Obama for killing Bin Laden is like going into McDonalds and thanking Ronald McDonald for the hamburger. It's the guy cooking the burger that should get the credit, not the clown.” Quote courtesy of Gray Ghost

The Constitution of the United States


  1. I always love to point out to a liberal that I received better grades than Al Gore in all environmental classes. But, like all peons, they disregard his "immense knowledge" of the climate and follow him like a zombie.

    By the way, I'm moving down to Kerrville, about an hours drive from San Antonio next week! I'll be leaving a liberal governor and living under Perry, who actually cares about his state.


  2. Eric,
    my father-in-law is living in a trailer park in Kerrville. 3-tour Vietnam Marine who left the Corps in 71 to become a N'awlins cop.

  3. (D) One of the stratagems for takeover by the communist party is to destroy all religion. Remember...well you might not be old enough...but in Russia the churches were closed. Priests persecuted.

    (E) Has anyone ever wondered how Gore qualifies as an expert on meteorology? Did he read a book? Go to school?? Or have a little gnome whisper in his ear???

    (F) Florida is on the right track. No CLEAN drug test, no welfare.

    (H) Hard to say but Bashir might be right. Back about 1955 or '56, somewhere in there..Dodge came out with a car called, Dodge Texan. On each front fender it had a Texas flag. The Daughters of the Texas Revolution took MoPar to court and Dodge had to remove the emblem. Sure wish I had a Texan now. I'm sure the ferralgumment has a similar law. What would be litigated is if Palin's flags were advertisement or not.

    (I) Took my youngest to Hooters once. Years ago. The little prick squealed on me when we got home.

    (J) Back in the '50's..again... Readers' Digest had a glowing story about the ACLU and how it was for the underdog. Yeah. Luce's rag.

    (K) A 'racist" is whomever disagrees with the dictates of the left.

    (L) Frank uses his congressional influence to get his homo pal a job. And nothing is done.
    Senator Feinstein uses her influence to direct contracts to her husband's company. And nothing is done. Maxine Waters uses her influence to help a minority owned bank. And nothing is done.
    But let Sarah Palin paint some flags on her bus and the MSM will be up in arms...

    (N) "If y'all come across any weird/stooopid/strange news stories..." Uh. Number (N) is about as weird, stooopid and strange as they get.

  4. Crawfish, you might want to check on the State of Mississippi. In July of this year Mississippi will place a "similar to Florida" drug test into effect for receipt of entitlements and other freebies.

    BTW, did you ever decide if you were a "Red Swamp Crawfish" (Procambarus clarkii) or another species?


    Gray Ghost: a Hatchie River Crawfish (Procambarus ablusus)

  5. Buck,
    D) Yep, I remember.
    E) Someone explained to him that the envirowacko movement could be used for power and control...the rest is history
    F) I still say no freebies, PERIOD!
    H) Every time a liberal appears with a flag, it is a case of FALSE advertising!
    I) My wife and her female co-workers used to go there for lunch and grade the waitresses on the quality of their implants
    J) For the underdogs...underdogs like American communists, who are now no longer underdogs!
    K) Can't wait for them to call Allen West and Herman Cain "racists". Oh wait...for them the term is "Uncle Tom"
    L) Let Weiner.......
    Bob Packwood was run outta town for MUCH less.
    Clarence Thomas was almost denied a seat on SCOTUS for less
    Henry Hyde?
    Robert Livingston?
    Toe-tapping Larry Craig?
    Oh yeah….they’re all Republicans.
    N) thought you'd get a laugh outta that one.

  6. Ghost,
    Red Swamp is probably me, since the networks seem to have conspired to make red the color of conservatives instead of being the proper color of the Democrat-Socialist-Marxist-Communists. Blue SHOULD be the color of conservatives, since we are the ones who stand bravely in defense of the Constitution and our nation.

  7. Excellent pile. C ya next week.

  8. Crawfish,
    Great wrap-up as usual. I don't have anything to add that hasn't been said already.

    I am pleased that the glitches in blogger have finally been fixed. I could post but it wouldn't let me login to comment at this and several other blogs until yesterday. Must have been the Chinese!

    Clyde, are you OK?

  9. BTW, N was funny. I laughed out loud on that one.

  10. Good stuff Crawfish,

    I don't believe Scott has the dismal rating the press claims in their polls. I'm thankful he's there doing what he said he would so now it's time for the illegal sicans roundup and ship out that he claimed he would do whilst running.

    I don't believe that the binbastardobamster has the high rating the polls keep showing either this radical mussy bastard aint never done the first good thing in his sorry miserable life. From North Carolina to central Fla Iv'e not met anyone who likes the binbastard.

    I really enjoyed the aclu read. This is a group that I have stood against since the good pastor informed me some 20 odd yrs back that they were and are nogoodniks. The article confirms to me that they like the telepromter king have never done the first good thing in their history.


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